Get London's Best Bollards... On A Tea Towel!

By M@ Last edited 6 months ago

Last Updated 10 January 2024

Get London's Best Bollards... On A Tea Towel!

Know someone who loves bollards? And washing-up? Have we got the perfect gift for you!

Remember our diagram of London's bollards, arranged into a family tree? Well, it proved so popular that people started demanding it as a poster.

We almost listened, and arranged for the design to appear on a tea towel. Now, YOU can buy it.

A man in glasses holds up a wrinkled tea towel
What do you mean "You could have ironed it"?

What the heck is this?

London has many bollards. They come in a bounty of shapes and sizes. A few years back, we thought it'd be fun to try and arrange them into an imagined 'family tree', showing how the many and varied forms evolved from one another. To complete the conceit, we gave each bollard 'species' a Latin name.

The 'phylogenetic tree' soon proved popular. It's had millions of views, and was described as "truly wonderful" by no less an authority than the World Bollard Association.

Best of all, Network Rail were so impressed with our research that they displayed it on their station information boards at London Bridge. This really happened.

A man (Matt Bronwn) stands beside a digital display board, which shows our image of bollards of London.
Londonist's Matt Brown shows off his bollards on the concourse of London Bridge station, October 2017.

So how can I get the tea towel?

It's easy. Just head over the the Londonist shop, which is hosted by our partners at More T Vicar. Here you'll find the tea towel on sale.

While you're there, have a browse of our other items, which include novelty t-shirts, hoodies and posters of other popular articles, like our map of Anglo-Saxon London.

What can I use it for?

First and foremost, it makes a good tea towel. It's particularly good at buffing Londonist mugs, but will work just as well on any piece of crockery.

Second, it's the ideal gift for the person who has everything... apart from a bollard-themed tea towel.

You might also consider using it as a cloth for polishing bollards. London's posts get pretty grimy in the winter weather. Do your bit for the cause by rubbing them clean with this customised cloth.

Bollards on a tea towel

I have a dishwasher. I seldom use a tea towel. What have you got for me?

The tree of bollards is, in fact, also available in high-quality poster format. It looks good on the wall, but it's not as absorbent and is not recommended for bollard polishing.

Get your bollard-tastic tea towel by placing your order here.