They say, in London, that you're never more than six feet away from a rat.
'They' are wrong. Rats are still common in the city, and occasionally cause serious issues. But most of us, most of the time, are significantly further than six feet from a rat.
Mice, meanwhile, are more pervasive, sneaking into our homes and workplaces, regularly seen scuttling around the edges of Tube platforms.
Rats and mice have always lived alongside us, and they've played a prominent role in London's history. Their numbers can boom from nowhere, as per this incident from 1903, which saw "millions" of rats overwhelm the West End. They lurk, prepatent, ready to pounce. They've already done so in fiction, thanks to James Herbert's London-set novel The Rats.
It's time we paid them more attention...
1. Plague rats
Say "rats" and "London" and the natural word association is "plague". London's population has been devastated on numerous occasions by flea-carrying black rats, most notably during the 'Black Death' of the mid-14th century and the 'Great Plague' of 1665. A rat features prominently on this plague stone on Seething Lane.
Actually, there is now some debate about the role of rats in spreading the plague. Recent research has suggested that human fleas may have been a more important vector in the rapid spread of the Yersinia bacteria, which cause plague. Have our ratty friends been traduced? Incidentally, the beaky figure of the plague doctor is itself of dubious repute. Such garb was recorded on the continent, but no direct evidence proves that anybody dressed like this in London during the plague years.
2. Banksy rats
Say "rats" and "London" circa 2005 and the natural word association would have been "Banksy". The still mysterious street artist built his early fame on sardonic, small-scale stencils, usually of rats in anthropomorphic poses. The one shown above was wiped from beneath Waterloo Bridge more than a decade ago. One or two Banksy rats still remain, including on Chiswell Street and in the passage under Cannon Street station. (And see number 11 of this list.)
3. ROA rats
The bulky vermin are a favourite subject among street artists. Banksy's own rats were was heavily inspired by the work of French stencil-master Blek le Rat, for example. Meanwhile, the Belgian artist ROA has painted numerous animals across town, including rodents. The one shown here has persisted on the side of The Bell pub in the Petticoat Lane area for well over a decade.
4. Sewer rats
"We rarely see rats down here," a Thames Water flusher once told me, while up to our nipples in cackish water. This was during a paddle in the Northern Outfall Sewer, the behemoth pipe that carries all of north London's poos and wees east to Beckton. The water flow is too strong for them, apparently. You do get rats in the smaller sewers, but they're not especially common (though see, again, the end of this list). The one photographed above is a fake plastic rat, positioned in the trunk sewer as a bit of an in-joke.
5. Tube mice
Very few readers, I suspect, have seen a sewer rat. In contrast, most will have glimpsed a Tube mouse. Tiny, cute and very fast, these murine scamps are a common sight at platform level. Their numbers declined during the pandemic, thanks to a huge reduction in waste food left on platforms, but they seem to have bounced back again.
6. The Philpot Lane mice
Often hyperbolised as London's smallest sculpture (or even statue), these tiny mice can be found clinging to the wall of 23 Eastcheap in the City. Nobody knows who put the mice-and-cheese there. I've seen references from the 1960s, but they may be part of the original build in the 1880s. One just-so story would have us believe that the mice represent two workmen who had squabbled over lunch during the building's construction, one of whom then fell to his death. Probably not, but nobody has a better theory.
7. Danger Mouse
The one-eyed murine hero and sidekick Penfold first hit our screens in 1981, voiced by David Jason and Terry Scott. A revived 2015 version — even better in my opinion — cast Alexander Armstrong and Kevin Eldon in the roles. Both iterations place the rodents' lair inside a postbox on Baker Street.
Head to Melcombe Street opposite the tube exit on Baker Street and you'll find just such a box. It was recently decorated with a fake Blue Plaque dedicated to the duo. Sadly, that got stripped away. Then, in 2024, this intricate postbox topper appeared. I don't know if it's still there, but chances are the postbox will not stay mouse-free for long.
8. Bagpuss
While we're talking children's shows, behold the Marvellous Mechanical Mouse Organ from Bagpuss. The sedate, folksy programme from the 1970s (repeated extensively in the 80s) features a set of old toys that come to life when nobody is watching... two decades before Woody and Buzz. The show was one of many gems created by Oliver Postgate and Peter Firmin — both Londoners in their youth. The mouse organ was spotted at the old Museum of Childhood, though I'm not sure if it's on display since their revamp as Young V&A.
9. The Clapham mouseholes
Bootscrapers, while occasionally useful, are now a mostly redundant relic from a pre-tarmac age of horse dung and mud. One place with a surfeit of scrapers is the western side of Clapham Common. A few years back, one of the residents found a new purpose for one of these niches — a cute cubby hole for a toy mouse family. By the time I got round to visiting, the tiny occupants had become deluged with possessions. The once pristine mousehole was now all a-clutter with junk. Questions have to be asked of the shifty looking lemur, fleeing the scene.
10. The Mousetrap
No list of London mice would be complete without reference to Agatha Christie's record-breaking play. The Mousetrap has run almost continuously (caveat for Covid) since 1952. By 1957 it had already broken the record for the West End's longest-running play. It's still going. I've never seen it, but I suspect that no actual mice feature in the plot.
11. Dawn of the super-rat
Lest we imagine London's rodent troubles were all in the past, take a look at these recent news items. Rats, it seems, are on the rise once again, swamping housing estates, parks and restaurants. One report claimed the pests were growing as large as dogs, after gnawing on fatbergs in the sewers. The pictures are amazing. But we can't help smelling a rat.
Liked this? You might also enjoy other entries in this series, including Round London by bear, camel, creepy-crawlies, dragons, foxes, fish, horses, lions and lionesses, pigeons, rabbits (and hares), swans and tigers.
