Rumours are flying that veteran film director and naff commercial starlet Michael Winner may have to have a leg removed, and might even die, after picking up a mystery ailment in Barbados. Let's hope he had good insurance cover.
Winner, 71, is being treated at a private Harley Street hospital after what is thought to have been a reaction to medication taken while on holiday.
Some reports are suggesting that he may have already lost a lower limb, certainly an imaginative way to shed a bit of weight after the Christmas season. The corpulent Londoner is treating the situation with characteristic good humour, though, and seems to scotch any possibility of a missing appendage.
"I have been interested in recent newspaper reports suggesting I had lost, or was about to lose, one leg, two legs, an arm, a head - some people suggesting this went some time ago! - or even a fingernail. I am happy to tell you that, when I last looked, all of these items appeared solidly where they have been for many years."
For what it's worth, our money's on his left big-toe.
Image taken from LewishamDreamer's Flickr photostream.