Do You Want To Know A Secret?

By sizemore Last edited 216 months ago

Last Updated 20 December 2006

Do You Want To Know A Secret?
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The FBI have released ten pages of their 'Now That's What I Call Lennon' series:

The FBI has released its final surveillance documents on John Lennon to a university historian who has waged a 25-year legal battle to obtain the secret files. The 10 pages contain new details about Lennon's ties to leftist and anti-war groups in London in the early 1970s, but nothing indicating government officials considered the former Beatle a serious threat, historian Jon Wiener told the Los Angeles Times in Wednesday's editions.

Ah good old Lennon. He got a lot more interesting once the Beatles had split and then ensured his immortality by getting shot by Jodie Foster or something. We always preferred The Monkees.

The newly released documents include a surveillance report stating that two prominent British leftists had courted Lennon in hopes that he would finance "a left-wing bookshop and reading room in London" but that Lennon gave them no money. Another page states that there was "no certain proof" that Lennon had provided money "for subversive purposes."

All mouth and no wallet eh? We suspected as much.

Prominent British Leftist: So can you lend us the rent this month?

John Lennon: All you need is love.

Prominent British Leftist: Well actually the landlord would prefer a cheque

John Lennon: We can work it out

Prominent British Leftist: You did bring the money?

John Lennon: Money...

Prominent British Leftist: That's what I want.

John Lennon: With a little help from my friends...

Prominent British Leftist: Oh for fuck's sake.

Weiner lets loose an odd quote to round things off:

"I doubt that Tony Blair's government will launch a military strike on the U.S. in retaliation for the release of these documents,"

Launch a military attack in retaliation for something? That's just not Tony's style. He much prefers a preemptive magical mystery tour when it comes to deploying the armed forces.