"Zzzzzz... What? Eh? What have I missed?" If you've just woken up from Saturday's coma-inducing FA Cup Final, you've missed entirely nothing.
One hundred and twenty minutes of the most turgid football ever witnessed at an FA Cup Final was followed by a penalty shoot-out which Arsenal won. There's not really a lot more to be said.
On the balance of play Arsenal didn't deserve to win. They brought absolutely nothing to the game and walked away with the most prestigious domestic cup trophy in the world. Not that Gunners fans care one jot about this mind; and why should they? They may have lost the war against Chelsea, but winning this battle against Manchester United at least gives them bragging rights for a year over the other top-three club.
Immediately after the game Arsene Wenger began his apologies: "We knew it was our last chance to win a trophy and I felt that it was important, without Thierry Henry, not to concede the first goal. That's why I went for a more cautious approach on this one day to get what we wanted at any price. But I'm not convinced that you always have to play like that."
Thierry Henry's agent must be rubbing his hands at the prospect of his next contract negotiations.
So that's it then. Arsenal won the cup, Ronaldo cried, and we witnessed what could turn out to be the beginning of the end of Malcom Glazer's latest sporting franchise. Not that the Londonist is particularly concerned about that - you can read about it elsewhere. As for Arsenal, new signings are promised over the summer and on this performance they'll need them.