It's been a strange ol' week for Londonist music-wise. On Monday we got worried about a rise in nightclub violence, on Tuesday caught Goldfrapp at Union Chapel, on Wednesday caught Nick Cave at HMV and on Thursday got excited about a new-ish club night at Three Blind Mice. Looking ahead to this week however, Monday sees Panic At the Disco and Kate Nash play sold out shows at the Roundhouse and Hammersmith Apollo respectively, whilst......

Where's your sense of humour, blokes? Can't a fat, hairy-chested guy fake being crucified while wearing pink boxers anymore? Well, he can't in the tube. London Underground censors just banned posters for Fat Christ, a play showing this week at Islington's King's Head Theatre. They fear the ads in Angel station, showing the mock crucifixion of the play's writer, Gavin Davis, are "likely to offend ethnic, religious or other major groups." The author, though, apologizes......

Hello Jeff! Ho ho ho and a bottle of rum - it's Christmas time! Happy Saint Jesus Day, to almost all of you! And what an event it is - a time for giving, sharing, and taking; a time for thinking about the past, as well as looking forward to the future, all the while contemplating the here and now; a time of remembrance and joy, coupled with inebriation, rage, and light misogyny. And......

Gothamist learned about the craziest urban nightmare come true: A huge python found in the bathroom pipes. It was also a nightmare for some Yankees fans, as manger Joe Torre declined to come back and manage the Bronx Bombers. At least the city's attempt to give some direction to subway riders was interesting, pranksters went shirtless at the Fifth Avenue Abercrombie & Fitch and the I Heart Brooklyn Girls calendars came out. And just......

Man gets 'stiff sentence' for 'accidentally' sending people pictures of his penis. He thought it would never stand up in court. Great train robber Ronnie Biggs says his life has been wasted. Not at all. Without him, we wouldn't have had that superlative 'Buster' film with Phil Collins. Grandmother dies after being disorientated my mirrors in a shop. Ramsay's treat. Celebrity chef attains his 12th Michelin star. Shortly before being shot, de Menezes alighted......

Arsenal profits on the rise, thanks to new stadium. The allotment keepers' last stand. Where's Arthur Fowler when you need him? Oh yeah. Dead. Trafalgar Square art exposes ills of the sex trade. The folk who decide which supernatural beings are worth worshiping declare that Jesus' mum is not haunting a Surbiton pine tree. Baron von Greenback has urine-drinking wife. Image courtesy of the ever-brilliant onionbagblogger via the Londonist flickr group.......

Heathrow lady sacked for wearing a tiny, almost invisible stud. Story more amusing if you exchange the words stud and lady. Playboy opening massive store in London. No jokes to be had here. iPhone for UK launched in London. Generates 1025 stories on Google News. Still not bigger than Jesus, currently charting 19,695 hits. Losers. The Shard skyscraper is stalling because of 'credit crunch'. You can almost hear the documentary makers searching their audio......

Protest over national vs. regional chains, the never-ending debate over the place of cars and bicycles in our metropolises, professional sports scandals, remembering a solemn day, and being issued a search warrant - it all happened across our sites this week! Another banner week at Chicagoist started off with daily reports from food writer Lisa Shames on her attempt to eat only locally grown and raised foodstuffs all week as part of a farmers market......

It seems summer is officially over now (though it seems to have never properly arrived really…), and with that the early autumn tours start to make an appearance. First on Monday night are two bands that are playing at this weekend’s Connect festival, Modest Mouse and the Polyphonic Spree. American band Modest Mouse play the Forum, with standing tickets sold out, but still with seats available at £18.50 each. The Spree brings their triumphant show......

Busy week for music as bands start to warm up for the massive festival known as Glastonbury next weekend. Monday night sees Pearl Jam grace Wembley Arena, with support coming more than ably from the brilliant Idlewild. Tickets are sold out; however as always check for a last minute allocation or Scarlet Mist for a fair deal. Doors are at 6pm. Everyone’s favourite Liverpudlians The Coral grace the Astoria as a warm up for Glastonbury,......

Always on the scout for the best the city has to offer, Londonist has caught wind of a cheeky little theatre deal to tempt you into one of its most vibrant and newly buffed up venues. Vernon God Little is currently showing at the Young Vic, just down The Cut from its bigger, creakier sibling, The Old Vic (no relation). Vernon God Little, the novel, won the Man Booker Prize in 2003 with its......

Buttoned Down Disco is a phenomenon that's been going for a couple of years now, you join a mailing list, they tell you where and when the next party is and people turn up and rejoice to a funky mix of indie, cheese, pop, and everything in between. Buttoned Down Liveshow is a monthly event, sort of like the Disco's younger sister. 4 bands and an all night barbecue for £5. It's great! We......

Describe an urban ‘Street Pastor’ with his or her distinctive blue jacket and you may well bring to mind a God-bothering New-York-style Guardian Angel, or some fresh development in the Jesus Army. However, Pastor Les Isaac, took time out from his crusade for peace to explain to Londonist that his multi-denominational Street Pastors are nothing like either. "We come as peaceful people to try and maintain peace," he said, adding that, "if your approach......

Fresh Next Week: This years T.S. Eliot Memorial Lecture is titled Lachrymae rerum: writing about loss. Dannie Abse reads both from Running Late, his latest collection of poetry, and from The Presence, a journal he has been keeping since his wife’s death in the summer of 2005. Alan Jenkins, Deputy Editor of the TLS, reads from his collection A Shorter Life, which includes poems about his mother’s illness and death that have been described......

That most eclectic of musical festivals, the South Bank Centre's Meltdown, has announced its line-up for 2007. After a hiatus last year while the Centre was undergoing a much needed facelift, the festival is back with a bang - and this year it's being curated by channel-hopping, square-jawed music man, Jarvis Cocker. "We shall rouse you from your slumber. And you're going to love it," writes the bespectacled one on the South Bank website.......

Spring is when we get busy here in the Ist-A-Verse. Very busy. But, after staying bundled-up indoors all winter, it's nice for us to be out, about, and collecting things to write about for you. Here's a glimpse at what's been keeping your favorite citybloggers busily away from home and out of bed. For LAist, strong winds attacked LA on the same day the Feds raided the Crips. Not to fear, though: the Japanese version......

A tribute to the capital’s alleys, ginnels and snickleways. 27. Cobb's Court Where? Northern strand in a City cavalcade of passages. This one's located in the snickety heaven south-west of St Paul's. What? Cobb's Court was a new, if modest, addition to the City after the Great Fire, built on ground formerly occupied by St Anne, Blackfriars. Passage-master Ivor Hoole suggests the name may come from Paul Cobb, Mayor of Bedford, who had documented liason's......

One of the 21 July suspects claims that their bombs were intentional fakes. Crystal meth is more popular than Jesus. Heather and Paul back together... in court. An armed robbery was an inside job. People in chains have begun to march from Hull to London.......

And we live by the river. Latest climate change news: We're fucked: Scientists have issued dire warnings about the threat from climate change, predicting average world temperatures will rise by around three degrees by the end of the century, with devastating consequences. In the UK, rising sea levels could potentially cause huge damage to low-lying areas, including London and coastal and river areas. It's not all doom and gloom though. The Independent this morning......

The Wise Men gave the baby Jesus gifts of frankincense, gold, and myrrh. What is myrrh? Eddie Izzard believed myrrh might have been an illicit rollable herb of the Roman Era. He was wrong, of course. Wasn't he? And the Wise Men, as depicted in "Monty Python's Life of Brian" (1979) explained that myrrh was - if memory serves - a kind of bomb. But ever-reliable Wikipedia says that myrrh was an ancient perfume......

Speaking of Christmas trees, London Underground unveiled a rather isolated little tree at Kings Cross St Pancras a couple of days ago. Complete with Tube symbol decorations. It's a thing of beauty. But never in the field of seasonal decorations has such a lovely gesture looked so out of place, sitting as it does amongst the clinically polished halls of the new interchange. We love Kings Cross Tube at the moment for so many......

A tribute to the capital’s alleys, ginnels and snickleways. 12. St Chad's Place Where? Dingy little dogleg behind King's Cross Thameslink. What? Ah, St Chad. You know, the brother of St Cedd and St Cynibild? Founder of the moanstery at Barrow-upon-Humber? Patron saint of rigged elections? No? Since ancient times, this spot contained a small, health-giving spring dedicated to the saint. St Chad's Well, was one of several ancient and important water supplies associated......

The yoof of today. They’re just too brainy for their own good. Take Peter and Paula Imafidon, a pair of twins from Waltham Forest. They both just passed a GCSE in statistics. Age six. Jesus. When we were six, the closest we got to statistical expertise was assessing the likelihood of getting caught taking a leak in the park. Actually, that’s still about the extent of it. Meanwhile, at the other end of town,......

The bank holiday Gatwick Express strike is off as is the Stansted baggage handlers strike. News International are going to launch the London Paper a fortnight early to get it out ahead of Associated Newspapers' London Lite. Does anyone still care about this? Computer games design guru Will Wright will be making an appearance at a special event in London next week to talk about the future of gaming. Click here for details of......

Those who maintain that South London really isn’t a bit shit have a new and unexpected ally. Aliens. They can’t get enough of the place. Gobsmacked witnesses watched on in amazement as two sets of bright orange lights flew eerily in formation through the skies above Balham and Tooting on Friday, August 4. No doubt checking out that superb new supermarket in Norwood. You see, they know the area well. Reports of mysterious flying......

This week's effort comes from an 'Andy Nomynous' (that may not be his real name). This one's just plain scary - and that's before we consider the clock. Think about the health and safety issues. If that boat hits a rock, the small child is either going to end up lodged inside the grizzly, or thrown back into the giant propellor. And given that Big Ben isn't known for its 20/20 vision and boating......

So yesterday we reported on the fact that London seemed to be the place to have risky, publix sex. Becker's done it, Aguilera's done it...and now we find out that Chris Tarrant's done it. (Hang on a second, we threw up a little bit of food in our mouths just then, and now we have to go and get a drink of water.) Ok, we're back. Yes, according to the Mirror's 'exclusive' "TV Millionaire......

Every one these days seems to have a MySpace page - Kelly Osbourne, Chuck Norris, Bruce Campbell, the Winner / Sinner guy... Of course you're never 100% sure that the tripe written on these pages has really come from the person in question, but then again is there really someone with that much time on their hands that they'd stoop to impersonating Philip Howard? Well yeah probably. The photos he's uploaded all seem to......

Jesus. This one was a right bugger to photograph. Twenty sodding paces long, and stitched together from 17 images. You have to imagine the four rows arranged end to end in one long row if you want to read it. You can find the writing down Shelton Street in Covent Garden. (There's also a bonus graffito from Monkeyboy above it.) Apparently, these are the lyrics to a song by Hair, and have been here......

Nickelodeon have announced that they are to develop a "a $30 million family film about kids who are inspired by the Olympics." And the name? Legend of the Rings. Jesus, we can almost hear the sound of the Tolkien estate readying their legal papers from here. We're also told that Legend of the Rings will focus on "children who are inspired to greatness by watching the games" and that it's inspired by...erm, 'Inspiration', the......