Things To Do Today In London: Wednesday 8 August 2018

Looks like this article is a bit old. Be aware that information may have changed since it was published.

All aboard the Laugh Train Home with Jeff Innocent.

What we're reading:

Things to do:

LONDON FIRE BRIGADE MUSEUM: Take the kids to the London Fire Brigade's pop up museum for some arty activities and a lesson in fire safety. They'll even get to travel through time with the help of the green screen photo sessions. London Fire Brigade Pop-up Museum (Lambeth), free, book ahead, 10am-1pm

THE EXPECTATIONS: To mark the 70th anniversary of the arrival of the HMT Empire Windrush, the Black Cultural Archives will be showcasing 70 photographs by Neil Kenlock celebrating British Black community leaders from the 60s and 70s. The exhibition is curated by the photographer's daughter, Emelia Kenlock, and includes images of activists Olive Morris, Courtney Law, and Lord David Pitt. Black Cultural Archives (Brixton), free, just turn up, until 28 September

MEET THE TEASPOONS: Join the Teaspoon family for some cutlery-themed chaos at Tabard Theatre. Can they stop their naughty next-drawer neighbours the Knives from stirring up trouble at Mr Baker's birthday party? Tabard Theatre (Chiswick), £12, book ahead, 11am/1pm

PINT-SIZED PAPERCUTTING: Shobhna Patel is coming to Discover Children's Story Centre to teach your 5-9 year-olds the fine art of papercutting. Your ticket includes all-day access to the centre. Children's Story Centre (Stratford), £6.50, book ahead, 2pm

THE LONDON EAR: From hurried footsteps and boozy chatter to the clanging of Bow Bells, the City at rush hour sure is noisy. But don't reach for your headphones just yet. Join The London Ear on a guided walk where you'll peel back the district's sonic layers and hone in on what we normally filter out. Meet at St Botolph-without-Bishopsgate Gardens (Bishopsgate), £15, book ahead, 5.30pm-7.30pm

Take the kids to Meet The Teaspoons.

BARDS, POETS AND PLAYWRIGHTS: Discover Southwark Cathedral's literary heritage on a guided evening tour. You'll learn how the likes of Shakespeare, Dickens and many more are connected to the ancient site. Southwark Cathedral, £8, book ahead, 6.30pm-7.30pm

POEMS NOT BOMBS: The Poetry Cafe's open mic night returns with the theme of 'poems not bombs'. Got a relevant rhyme in mind? Sign up tonight between 7pm and 7.30pm to read, or simply sit back and enjoy readings from Geoff Stevens Memorial Poetry Prize winners Nicola Jackson and Paul McGrane. The Poetry Cafe (Covent Garden), free (donations welcome), just turn up, 7.30pm-10pm

WITCH: When it comes to legendary Zamrock band We Intend To Cause Havoc (aka WITCH), the clue's in the name. See them tear it up live at OSLO tonight. OSLO (Hackney), £13.75, book ahead, 8pm

HEATHERS: The endlessly quotable 80s cult comedy classic that is Heathers is getting a 4k restoration premiere at the BFI. Not only will you be able to see the shoulder pads, grisly death scenes, and baby Christian Bale's evil smirk like never before, director Michael Lehmann and actor Lisanne Falk (aka Heather McNamara) will be there to answer your burning questions. BFI Southbank, £15, book ahead, 8.10pm-11.10pm

JEFF INNOCENT: Next stop on the Laugh Train Home is Jeff Innocent's stand-up gig. See the East End funnyman perform alongside Eric McElroy, Hurt and Anderson, and MC Ria Lina tonight. The Four Thieves (Battersea), £7, book ahead, 8.30pm-10.30pm

Good cause of the day

Got some free time to give to a worthy cause? Find out which charity would be a good fit for you at this charity and volunteer match-making event. 10 local London charities and NGOs will give a short presentation on what they do and who they are looking for, followed by a networking session where you can chat about getting involved.