Things to do this week is sponsored by Chariot.
BERNSTEIN CENTENARY: The centenary of Leonard Bernstein, America’s greatest 20th century composer, is celebrated in this Royal Ballet triple bill. His musicals such as West Side Story had enormous dance routines, but here it is his symphonies, concertos and religious music that take centre-stage in three new — or newish — creations. Read our four-star review. Royal Opera House, Covent Garden, £4-£70, book ahead, until 9 April
ZONE ONE VRCADE: Feel like you need a respite from reality? Pull on a headset and try out an assortment of social VR games, including an industry first "inter-Pub gaming league" game. Plus, there's pizza and pool for afters. Switch off and plugin. Escape Lost Rivers Elephant, Elephant and Castle, £39, book ahead, until 30 April
GO SEE SOME ART: Looking for a dose of culture? Then you're in luck as we've rounded up the best (and worst) exhibitions on in London right now.
Monday 26 March
SCREEN PRINT A TOTE: Upgrade your Sainsburys long life bag to a tote you've pimped yourself in this three hour screen printing session led by Lewis from 3rd Rail Print Space. Drink Shop & Do (King's Cross), £35, book ahead, 7pm
SUFFRAGETTE SCREENING & Q&A: It took nearly a century for the suffragettes to get the biopic they deserve. If you missed Suffragette when it came out in 2015, now's your chance to see it and hear from the film's director alongside Helen Pankhurst and Catherine Mayer – co-founder of the Women’s Equality Party. Royal Albert Hall (South Kensington), £15, book ahead, 7pm
Tuesday 27 March
COMEDY: Let Tez Ilyas liven up your Tuesday night with his trademark cheek and uncompromising approach to stand up, which doesn't shy away from politics. Soho Theatre, £10, book ahead, 7.30pm, until 31 March
SOHO UNCENSORED: With new hotels and office blocks springing up, present-day Soho seems way more sanitised than the seedy Soho you'll hear about on this tour of the area's X-rated past, led by City of Westminster Guide Joanna Moncrieff. Soho Square Gardens, £12, book ahead, 6pm-8pm
AN EVENING OF MEAT: This lavish six-course spread is served up with a whole load of table dancing. But the message is a feminist one, the idea being to disrupt the idea of the female body being treated as "a piece of meat". Don't miss your chance to become a part of this boundary-breaking performance. The Vaults, from £35, book ahead, 6.30pm
TEMPLE CINEMA SEASON FIVE: Cineworld isn't a patch on this marble-lined, Greek-style Masonic Temple, where tonight's saucy offering is Adrian Lyne, an "iconic piece of 1980's big screen erotica". Andaz Liverpool Street, £15, book ahead, 7.30pm-10pm
PHILIPPA MO: The talented Philippa Mo returns with a stunning collection of solo violin music exploring the Solo Sonatas and Partitas by Bach framed by the fantasias of Telemann. Shortwave Cafe, £10, book ahead, 7.45pm
JOSIE LONG & FRIENDS: The disarmingly charming Josie Long performs tonight alongside her pals Bisha K Ali, Jonny and the Baptists & John-Luke Roberts. Anything could happy but you'll probably just laugh a lot. The Bill Murray, (Islington) £7, book ahead, 8pm-11pm
Make this the week that your commute changes for the better
Do you live in one of those places that London’s transport network doesn’t quite reach?
We feel you. But with the launch of Chariot’s four new commuter shuttle routes, those stressful and convoluted morning journeys could be a thing of the past.
The new service links up key transport hubs south of the river with a fast, efficient and friendly minibus shuttle service, complete with mod cons like WiFi, air conditioning and handy storage for laptop bags and briefcases. Plus, they can make use of the city’s network of bus lanes to zip past that rush hour traffic, just like normal buses.
So, how do you grab a seat on one of these things? Easy - just fire up the Chariot app, and you’ll be directed to the nearest pickup point. You can track the progress of your shuttle in real time, and there’ll be a seat waiting for you when it arrives. Can’t go wrong with that.
Click here to transform your commute.
Wednesday 28 March
WOMEN'S MONTH AT POLPO: One way to dine out with a clear conscience is to book a table at Polpo. Tonight's dinner includes a talk on the issues women face today, from Lisa King, communications director at Refuge. 50% of the proceeds are donated to the charity, which helps women and children who have been affected by domestic violence. Polpo (Soho), £45, book ahead, 6pm-11pm
FROMAGE A TROIS CHEESE PARTY: Do not miss your chance to stuff your face with dairy at the Fromage à Trois cheese party. Rascals, Shoreditch, £35, book ahead, 6.30pm-10.30pm
LOST RIVERS WITH TOM BOLTON: You're probably familiar with the Regent's Canal but have you heard of the River Fleet? Unlikely, as it was buried under roads and houses in the 19th century but Tom Bolton's walk will lead you around the streets which follow the curves of this long lost river. Camden tube station, £18, book ahead, 6.15pm-8pm
TATE TAP TAKEOVER: This month's Tap takeover by Fourpure Brewing is an Easter special, so the tasting includes raspberry & chocolate Imperial Porter made from fresh British raspberries, roasted cocoa nibs and whole vanilla pods. You don't have to be mad on modern art to attend but a love for beer and chocolate is compulsory. Tate Modern, £15-£22, book ahead, 6.30pm-10.30pm
Thursday 29 March
VOICES FROM THE DEEP: Like a Blue Peter time capsule come early, you can see more than 700 personal letters recovered from a ship which has been sitting at the bottom of the Atlantic for more than three quarters of a century. The Postal Museum (Clerkenwell), included in general admission (£11), book ahead, 10am-5pm, until 13 January 2019
ART DECO HOLLOWAY: Did you know Holloway is a hotbed of art deco architecture? Soak up the decorative style of the 1920s and 1930s on this tour. Holloway Road, £9-£12, book ahead, 2pm-3.30pm
THE MESMERIST: Hear the story of John Elliotson, the main who brought hypnotism to London in 1837, from Wendy Moore who has written a book on the physician detailing his eventual downfall. Benjamin Franklin House (Charing Cross), £6, book ahead, 6.30pm-8pm
Friday 30 March
EASTER CANOPY MARKET: Bring your offspring to this lovely covered market for an Easter egg hunt (if you can drag them away from the sheep show). Have your face painted, drop in to workshops with the House of Illustration and tuck into tasty hot cross buns and Easter Simnel cake courtesy of Bread Ahead. West Handyside Canopy, King's Cross, free entry, just turn up, noon-6pm, 30 March-1 April
CHELSEA ARTS AND CRAFTS EXHIBITION: Sip a complimentary glass of wine as you peruse stalls bursting with unique jewellery, stylish homewares and snazzy artworks. 30% of sales are donated to the New Horizons Community Centre and Open Age UK. So you can splash out with a clean conscience. New Horizons Community Centre (Chelsea), free entry, just turn up, noon-6pm
HORSE MEAT DISCO: Get your bank holiday off to a cracking start at this Easter special hosted by south London disco collective Horse Meat Disco. Gone Burger and Lords of Dough provide rooftop munching opportunities while DJs spin tunes into the wee hours. Prince of Wales (Brixton), from £17.50, book ahead, 4pm-4am
POWER UP!: Get your gaming fix at the Science Museum, where you can try out the best (and most addictive) video games, computers and consoles from the past four decades. Science Museum, £10, book ahead, until 15 April
Saturday 31 March
JAZZ FOR KIDS: Start 'em on the jazz greats young at this kid's concert, featuring music from female jazz icons Ella Fitzgerald, Nina Simone, Diana Krall and more. Royal Albert Hall, South Kensington, £11, book ahead, 11am and 1.30pm
URBAN FOOD FEST: It sounds like an oxymoron but gourmet street food is a thing and you'll find it in a carpark in Shoreditch. At Urban Food Fest you'll find international cuisine from 15 rotating traders, so there will always be something different to satisfy those hanger pangs. Euro Car Parks, free entry, just turn up, noon-midnight
MADLAB COCKTAIL MASTERCLASS: You might enjoy a cocktail but do you know how to mix one up? You will after this molecular masterclass, which will teach you how to infuse, foam and garnish like a pro. Madison, £30/ £240 for eight people, book ahead, ongoing
Sunday 1 April
MIDDLE EASTERN COOKERY WORKSHOP: Learn how to cook up a banquet fit for Middle Eastern royalty at this informal cookery class, which lasts two to three hours. Just email ahead with a time that suits you. Tales of Jewish Sudan Kitchen (Putney), £40-£50, book ahead, all day
WALTHAMSTOW VEGAN MARKET: Get your animal-free fix at this regular market showcasing the best vegan traders of E17 and beyond. Enjoy a bevVy after at the brewery. Wild Card Brewery Lockwood, Walthamstow, free entry, just turn up, 11am-4pm
SOCIAL SKETCH-UP: Do you like doodling, colouring or zine making? Then you'll enjoy this spring-themed zine making class with creative games, cocktails and cream eggs a plenty. Drink Shop & Do (King's Cross), £15, book ahead, 2.30pm-4.30pm