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WUNDERCAMERA: PM Gallery and House in Ealing is the setting for a new photography exhibition celebrating the world's museums and galleries, to show the ways in which cultural venues display their works. Free, just turn up, until 11 January 2014
WINTER WONDERLAND: The Hyde Park Christmas monster is back with ice skating (and an Ice Kingdom), circuses, rides and, of course, SANTTAAAA! See website for details, until 5 January 2014
IGGYFEST: Go Iggymad at the Institute of Contemporary Arts' Iggyfest: Blah Blah Blah. The next two days feature live performances, film screenings, talks, DJ sets and an Iggy karaoke party. See website for full listings, until 23 November
MUSIC SPEED DATE: A take on traditional speed dating, Remixed Speed Dating at Rich Mix gives you four minutes to swap ideas with established musicians, producers and remixers. If you like what you hear there will be the opportunity to catch up later in the bar. Free, prebook, 1-9pm
SCANDAL: Pimlico Library hosts a writers’ panel with Gabrielle Kimm, Linda Stratmann and Hallie Rubenhold focusing on sex and scandal in Georgian/Victorian England. Free, prebook, 6pm
PERCUSSION: An interesting mix of plant pots, nudity, tables and tapdancing at Theatre of Percussion, Limewharf. £5.50, prebook, 6.30pm
SCULPTURE: University of the Arts takes over the Royal Academy for an evening of sculpture workshops, drinks and music inspired by the exhibition of British sculptor Bill Woodrow RA. Free, just turn up, 6.30-10pm
FILM: London-based cinema Passengerfilms screens Roman Polanski’s Chinatown at Shoreditch Village Hall along with a selection of short films and talks, as part of an exploration of water politics. £5, just turn up, 7pm
WINTRY POETRY: Wood Green’s Big Green Bookshop hosts an evening of winter poetry and open mic, plus mince pies and mulled wine. £3, just turn up, 7pm
JFK: A programme of music and readings to mark the 50th anniversary of the death of the John F Kennedy is at Christ's Chapel in Dulwich, with Dulwich Chamber Choir. £12/£7.50, just turn up, 7.30pm
ROLLER SKATE: The Friday Night skate starts at Wellington Arch. Anyone who feels competent on skates is welcome to join. Free, just turn up, 8pm
CLUB ON ICE: Horizon Festival are taking over the beautiful Somerset House ice rink for a night of House, Techno and Garage music courtesy of live DJs. £19.20, prebook, sessions from 8pm
Good Cause of the Day
We've got a cracking line-up of good causes for this weekend. In fact, so many good causes, we're going to have to introduce a new level of subheading, which will probably look really poor. Sorry. But it's for some good causes.
Friday 22 November
Enjoy Mexican food, drink and facial hair at the Misión México Moustache Party, Mestizo Restaurant. There are prizes to be won and all proceeds go directly to the children of Misión México ensuring love, life and hope. £20, prebook, 7pm
Comedian James Mullinger is returning to Kingston University, where he studied, to perform a one-off gig to raise money for Kingston University's Annual Fund. £8/£5, prebook, 7pm
Saturday 23 November
This is a really lovely idea. Over the past few weeks, artists, celebrities and local people have been making their own postcards with artwork in any medium on the front and back. Drawing, painting, photography, collage, potato printing — you name it — someone has done it. Today, go to Mr Simms Olde Sweet Shoppe in North Finchley to pick one for yourself, with money raised going to Age UK Barnet. Free, just turn up
Support Combat Stress and the Royal College of Surgeons at the University Lodges’ Ball, a white tie event at the HAC. Hosted by Masonic lodges from around the country, entertainment includes: live music, magic, a casino, laser clay pigeon shooting range, pamper room, ceilidh, cigar bar and more. Tickets include unlimited drinks and snacks all evening. £100, prebook
Sunday 24 November
Clothes & Disco
vInspired presents Car Boot Disco at Minsitry of Sound – a clothes-swapping and customisation party, launching the Get Trashed campaign to save 10,000 clothing items from landfill. Free, prebook, 3-7pm
Test your wits and win some fantastic prizes at the Lively Minds Annual Quiz, The Paternoster Pub. £13/£10, prebook, 7pm
London Connection Puzzle
Your full set of clue-phrases: JOHN BETJEMAN, WILLIAM WEBB ELLIS, MICHAEL BALCON and JEREMY BENTHAM. Worked out the London connection? We have a winner, so no need to email. The solution will be revealed on Monday.
London Weather by Inclement Attlee
You know what? Sort your own weather out. It's not hard. Either look out the window (the see-through thing behind the curtains), or have a guess. I mean, it's early winter. What do you expect the weather's going to be like? Cold, and generally miserable. It's not rocket science. Jesus. You people repulse me. Go away.
[Editor's note: Inclement Attlee is currently working through some issues. Unfortunately, they are back-issues of Curmudgeon's Weekly. We'll have a word and see if we can get something more cordial out of him for Monday. Or maybe we'll sack him.]