Take A Bullshit London Tour

By M@ Last edited 58 months ago
Take A Bullshit London Tour


Did you know that the London Eye is powered by animals, or that the Houses of Parliament were hewn from a giant pyramid, shipped over from Giza in Victorian times and chiselled down to size? Bullshit London has been offering 'factually inaccurate walking tours since 2013'. The message is simple: "London is an incredible city, so why should its tours be credible?". We recently joined them for a couple of hours of fabrication and embellishment par excellence.

We arrived at St Paul's under some trepidation. Would our guides actually be there, or was the whole thing bullshit? But Rob and Reuben (if those are their real names) were easy to spot, on account of their outrageous costumes and large 'Bullshit London' placard.

Their tour is geared up for Londoners, but focusses on the more touristy parts of town such as the South Bank and Whitehall. Struggling through the crowds at first seemed a little irksome, but it soon became apparent that there was a good reason. The constant barrage of nonsense and lies is certainly entertaining in its own right, but watching the reactions of passers-by is even more so. Some were confused, others duped, and one or two delicate souls seemed to find the word 'bullshit' offensive. Cheers all round for the particularly bold Polish tourist who joined in without prompting, as Rob and Reuben delivered another falsehood through the medium of beat-boxing.

It's not a tour for shrinking violets. You might be asked to hold hands with strangers, or join an impromptu pseudo-religious bullshit ceremony outside a certain organisation's Blackfriars HQ. Those who love this kind of participative entertainment will find much to cherish. Not every gag works, but the pace is frenetic, and the canards fly faster than French ducks.

Towards the end, we passed a group of boisterous lads who — mistaking us for naive tourists — indulged the age-old tourguide wind-up of shouting "It's all lies! He's making it up!". If only they knew.

Bullshit London puts the 'city' back into 'mendacity' and is the perfect way to learn less about the capital.

Tours leave every Thursday from the steps of St Paul's at 7pm and last approximately 2 hours. Prebook your place here.

See other alternative tours of London.

Last Updated 26 July 2013

diamond geezer

My Dad and I wondered if that was you wandering past Tate Modern last Thursday, behind the glittery bloke in the bowler hat. Seems that was no lie.


Hello Matt, Surprised to see a member of London Historians and a person who is knowledgeable about London giving time and space to a tour promoting incorrect information. Tours which give the real facts led by qualified trained guides can be just as entertaining but are possibly seen as not trendy or quirky enough for a mention on Londonist.

Trevor Johnson

This sounds really unfunny. Not wishing to hear "bullshit" in public does not make someone delicate. It means they have a reasonable expectation of good manners


I'm looking forward to going on one of these tours. Sounds like a more dynamic alternative to sitting in a comedy club. I might even read the 'real' history of London first, just so I know what not to expect ...
British, with an intact sense of humour, 95 going on 21 again!