Prepare for Blue Monday by getting your laughing gear in good order with some excellent cabaret entertainment this week. With zip, zero and zilch ado, here are our zingers for this week.
Zinger Of The Week: Eurofest @ Royal Vauxhall Tavern, Friday
Those awaiting this year's Alternative Eurovision with bated breath can finally exhale. The Terrence Higgins Trust holds a Euro-tastic fundraiser this weekend featuring hi-NRG pop from the UK's leading Eurovision DJ Dave Simmons, live performance from Hazell Dean and some international moves on the dance floor. Expect not to find David Cameron in the queue for the loos.
Cheer up and revel in The Winter Of Discontent as Dusty Limits and his changing cast dazzle with a blend of comedy, music, burlesque, circus and, um, some yoga. Here's what Mr Limits had to say for himself.
We'll be honest: we have no idea what "live video-feed painting" means but it sounds cooler than another night in with the soaps (even a rapped version). Invisible Thread's Plucked will be at the Roundhouse using the aforementioned technique alongside puppetry to produce a modern meditation on humanity and beauty. Coo.
Don't tell the 1% but there will be something for everyone to enjoy tonight at the Royal Opera House as Smashed by Gandini Juggling give us ball-chucking, theatre and dance topped off with (they say) "a cathartic finale you will long remember". Ooooh.
Amateur Rembrandts may want to pop into thisany243 month’s Dr Sketchy’s Anti-Art School at the RVT to see if there is still life in their drawing skills and lead in their pencil. Materials are provided including paper and inspiration care of a number of burlesque beauties with some fine entertainment mixed in throughout the evening.
If you're after a saucy threesome tonight, we can highly recommend the last night of the Winter Of Discontent (featuring different performers to Wednesday), the lusciously Lynchian delights of the Double R Club at Bethnal Green Working Men's Club and vintage porn purveyors ArtWank! at the Royal Vauxhall Tavern. Can someone invent a cloning machine before Thursday evening please? Ta.
La Reve, the best weekly cabaret show in town just got bigger and better and tonight they showcase the talents of (amongst others) the ballsy Matt Hennem and alt-ballet star Madame Galina and the awesomely coiffured songster Elliot Mason. Go.
If you haven’t see any panto so far, it’s not too late. With dwarf names like Fag Hag, Muscle Mary, Sub, Dom, Skinhead and Butch Dyke, you should have some idea of what you’re letting yourself in for. Snow White & The Seven Poofs is at the Leicester Square Theatre.
A mere few weeks after their last show of 2011, the never-less-than-awesomely attired duo Bourgeois & Maurice return to Bistrotheque with a new all-killer no-filler show Twatting About which compiles the best costumes and songs of the last four years.
Here's one in the eye for Marty McFly: Die Freche Muse's latest event, The Impudent Muse, goes back to the past with a blast. Expect an evening of interwar-inspired decadence including burlesque, vintage hoofing, some edifying chunks of The Threepenny Opera and Marianne Cheesecake with her tribute to Josephine Baker.
Londonist favourite Wilton's Music Hall is having a fundraiser with the Union Theatre delving into musical backlog to bring together a collection of numbers from The Pirates of Penzance, Iolanthe, Assassins, Dames at Sea, Fings Ain’t What They Used To Be and Bells are Ringing. All proceeds will go towards Wilton’s Capital Project.
Another strange and philosophical LIMF cocktail at the Southbank as Italian magician and acrobat Claudio Stellato shakes together circus and illusory magic to examine object manipulation and our inner selves in his new show L'Autre.
Timberlina is the bearded dragster with balls. Bingo balls. You can find him and relatively-sane Hey Baylen playing with them at the Royal Vauxhall Tavern tonight.
If you only see one circus show in 2012, you really should get out more. Having said that, you may as well ctch the best while you can as La Soiree will certainly perk you up. We saw them recently and can honestly say that we haven’t seen spectacles this big since Dennis Taylor started wearing contact lenses. We previewed the show here.
Aussie artist Fleur Elise Noble's new work 2 Dimensional Life Of Her is literally off the wall. Projections and animations combine to alter the audience's perceptions as they stand in the artist's studio. Wowsers.
Our video of the week shows Matt Hennem and his amazing ball control. He'll be at La Reve this Friday.