Speaking to a group of fans last week, West Ham chairman David Gold conceded that when his club moves into the Olympic stadium, the arena could be re-named for one of his various companies — and suggested that Ann Summers might be the one chosen.
Clearly Mr. Gold was joking and the erotic emporium is unlikely to be lending its name to the ground (despite The Sun and the Daily Mail getting rather engorged by the idea — kudos to the Sun's graphics department for their saucy re-invention of the Olympic rings). Indeed, the club has hastily confirmed that the chairman had merely tossed off a "light-hearted comment".
Yet if Gold is serious about re-naming it, his business interests aren't really the kind of family-friendly fare you expect to see emblazoned across your club's home: he previously owned Gold Star Publications, a pornographic publisher, and his dabblings in the erotic arts once prompted rival chairman Simon Jordan to remark that Gold and partner David Sullivan "sell dildos for a living".
Keeping the lascivious and the football separate seems a sensible strategy. Or instead the club could perhaps go the whole hog and change their name to Wet Spot United, sign Stern John, Nicky Butt, and other smuttily-named players (suggestions welcome in the comments) and try to arouse their opponents into defeat.