Channel your inner punk princess, girls - it’s time for the London Rollergirls’ Season Championship!
Headed up by Captain Grievous Bodily Charm, reigning champions the Suffra Jets will be defending their title against the Ultraviolent Femmes, led by the feisty Antipodean, Kamikaze Kitten.
For those of you who haven’t encountered London’s most popular alternative sport before, think British Bulldog on rollerskates played by punked-out grrls in ripped fishnets. Roller derby is a full-contact women’s sport played on quad roller skates, by players skating around an elliptical track. The game consists of a series of two-minute countdown jams, where one skater from each team competes to complete a circuit of the track the fastest - and the teammates on the opposing side to whatever it takes to stop her.
As ever, it’s the kick-ass derby names that provide most of the entertainment, with each skater taking on a tough rollergirl persona for the bout. Saturday’s bout sees Bexcorcist, Rose Hypnol, Missyle Elliot and Debbie Does Malice taking to the track. You get the best view the closer to the front you sit, but be warned - if you’re on the front row, you’re likely to get caught in the crossfire the minute one of the skaters gets knocked into the audience.
The championship is technically sold out, but if you’re lucky you might be able to snap up a spare ticket on the LRG forum or on Facebook. Don’t worry about ticket touts, this comes with their express permission - after all, no one wants to piss off a rollergirl. Even if you can’t make it, hit The Junction for the afterparty, and catch up on what you missed (whilst admiring some seriously hardcore bruises).
By Kaite Welsh
The London Rollergirls season championship is on Saturday 17th July, Tottenham Green Leisure Centre, 1 Philip Lane, N15 4JA. Doors 4pm for a 5pm start. £12 adults/ £6 children. Afterparty will take place at The Junction, 2a Corsica Street, London N5 1JJ