If you feel that all this election talk is getting a bit stale already, you'll be glad to hear that from tomorrow Londoners will be able to indulge their political tastes in a much more palatable fashion at Bompas and Parr's Parliamentary Waffle House in Carnaby where - as creator Harry Parr puts it - "politicians can reach out and touch voters' most sensitive organs: their bellies."
A bespoke menu tailored to each of the main political parties will be on offer, with the orders feeding into a live action swing-o-meter to show just how Londoners' tastes are changing. This won't just be a load of old waffle though, since it's been created by the Jellymongers, who previously served up a classic Gin and Tonic with a Gormley twist, and just before Christmas created a cocktail you could row across. These waffles have been developed as part of a research programme in conjunction with Central Saint Martins MA in Future Textiles, and will employ technology commonly used in the fabrication of fighter jet engines (although hopefully all this volcanic ash won't stall the project).
A soap-box and memo wall will be provided for partisans to air their views, whilst non-stop political coverage and leadership debates will be screened so drinkers and diners are up to speed on the latest tit-for-tat. If that's enough to turn your stomach though, you can peruse a display of politically related foodstuffs, from a step by step guide to Thatcher's Egg Diet, to the wrapper of the notorious Gummer burger. Maybe there'll even be a side serving of Miliband banana. Evenings will be given over to screenings such as In The Loop, Hot Breath Karaoke hosted waffle eating competitions, and Think Tank Thowdowns, whilst special lobbying nights will give the public access to the parliamentary big boys. On election night itself there will be an all night vigil with celebratory booze for the victors, and tea and sympathy for the losers.
Open from noon until midnight, right up until the election. If previous events are anything to go by, you'll need to get your tickets ASAP - £5 gets you a Parliamentary waffle, a scoop of ice-cream, glass of Prescott Punch. You'll leave as bloated as a pregnant chad.