We’re gob-smacked we are that Brits have a bad bed rep. As far as the eye can see, quite literally, we’re about as randy as a canine on heat. Sexual sighting number one: freshers strip during freshers week – now that sure is an original way to make friends (although the residents of Kingston might argue to the contrary). Sexual sighting number two: Swedish porn at the ICA. This really qualifies as six sightings, but who’s counting? Unfortunately this film festival has already come and gone, (again, excuse the pun), but we thought it was worth a mention nonetheless. And finally sexual sightings number three and four: the slightly awkward looking photo of twenty naked bottoms, which adorns the wall of the Admiral Hardy in Greenwich and the equally decorative big tinker that is splashed across the window of the Albert Tavern on Victoria Street.
Now don’t get all hot under the collar (or rather not) if you missed these saucy scenarios. There is still ample more to keep you, ahem, satisfied, ahem, in this city:
For those in search of an alternative to biology text books, the Barbican Art Gallery’s ‘Seduced: Art and Sex from Antiquity to Now’ is certainly informative, to say the least. It starts this Friday and spans three months. Marina Wallace, one of the curators, says:
We want London to be thinking about nothing but sex for the next three months.
Well, that should certainly provide an interesting twist to the year’s Christmas wish list. Jacqueline Gold of Ann Summer's fortune is sure to be smiling.
Failing Casanovas might want to check out the Amora Sex Theme Park in Leicester Square’s Trocadero Centre. At this ‘academy,’ visitors can make the most of their money by practising their newly learned skills on erogenous-sensitive sex dolls. Just don’t tell the other half, we think. And if that fails to be fun, why not visit neighbouring Soho, where there are stores aplenty for your inner hoho.
If you’re more into wearing sex than having it, pop over to the recently opened Playboy store on Oxford Street and trade those spare pennies for those bare bunnies.
Finally, get your undies off but keep your socks on with the naked bike ride coming up in June (now you really have no excuse not to frequent the gym and consequently bear that booty unabashed).
Oh London, what a lovely, loved-uped place to reside.
Photo courtesy of the author of this piece.