Kevin Alderton, 35, is blind and a world-record holding downhill skier.
Kevin must have access to some special supernatural powers – probably the Jedi arts – because whenever we are faced with adversity - misplacing the keys, running out milk - we burst into tears and scream "Why, God? Oh, why hast thou scourged us thus?!" Maybe Kevin does the same thing when he misplaces keys or runs out of milk, but when it comes to skiing downhill at high speeds without being able to see where he's going – no probs.
Granted, Kevin does have a partner who, via wireless transmitter, gives verbal guidance during the ski runs, but still…
I bet that guy gets really good Christmas presents and is always invited to parties.
But Kevin presently is in a struggle not to see, but to be seen. He intended to race in the FIS World Cup Speed Skiing circuit with the GB Speedski Team, but is lacking the necessary sponsorship to carry it through. He had attempted to pass out leaflets in the City of London to promote his endeavours but was stopped by police who reminded him that he needed local authority permission to distribute leaflets.
"It has got to the stage where if I do not get the financial backing I need to train and race in France, then it's all over," he said.
But we feel certain that The Force is strong with young Alderton (sound suspiciously like "Alderaan", eh?). Later this year, while we're whinging about those missing keys, Kevin will be, we hope, speeding down the Alps listening to the guiding voice in his head.
Oh, and by the way, just in case his story hasn't made you feel like a complete loser yet, Kevin lost his sight in a London bar fight defending a young woman from drunken attackers.