The man who cut his wrists in Malcolm Rifkind's Chelsea office before trying to daub slogans on the walls with his own blood, has been found guilty of criminal damage.
For the two or three people who haven't heard this incredibly bit of important news yet: Lindsay Lohan had her handbag half inched at Heathrow airport. It contained a ton of diamonds and some asthma medication.
Pete Doherty has put in a request to hire the ground of Queens Park Rangers for his wedding to Kate Moss (the reception, not the actual ceremony).
Contrary to rumour, Madonna is not a witch. It was thought she was going to play the role alongside Anita Dobson and Vinnie Jones at the gala benefit performance of Stephen Sondheim's Into the Woods at the Royal Albert Hall. But she's not.
And staying with the stage: The Hoff's replacement for the part of Hook in Wimbledon's xmas panto will be: Ross Kemp. Big wow.
Image of Kensington Gardens courtesy of Craigyt via the Londonist flickr group.
Last Updated 08 September 2006