Thighs Of The Machines

By M@ Last edited 150 months ago
Thighs Of The Machines

Forget Silicon Valley or the tech corporations of the far-east. The cyborg revolution starts here, in London. At UCL’s Centre for Biomedical Engineering, to be exact. Researchers there have found a way to bolt metal rods directly into the skeleton and then decorate them with flesh. The titanium implant sticks out through the skin to act as an attachment point for more complicated prosthetics.

This isn’t just theoretical speculation. It’s already in clinical trials using patients with missing fingers and thumbs, and looks ‘very encouraging’. Some of the survivors of the July 7 bombs might be next to benefit. You need some kind of degree in druidic incantation to pronounce the technique’s name though: intraosseous transcutaneous amputation prosthesis, or ITAP for short.

So what would life be like with a fused metal limb? Well, there’d be a few more questions during security scans, but you’d be able to pack a more powerful punch. We’d ask for the prosthesis to be magnetised, please. Just so we could wander round booming ‘Kneel before Magnetron,’ while attracting assorted pins and cutlery.

And could they give Abu Hamza a fleshy hook?

Image shamelessley nicked from Worth1000, for all your cyborg celebrity needs (except the Hoff, who has yet to undergo the process.)

Last Updated 06 July 2006