Friday Premiership Preview

By londonist_alex2 Last edited 144 months ago
Friday Premiership Preview
fraser.jpg

Afternoon all. Last week, Sarah scored 3 out of 5, which percentage-wise, is actually our best ever result. So there you are. Perhaps some sort of prize is in order. Any suggestions? Go on, leave a comment, it will make our day. It wouldn't have to be about Sarah, or even about the Premiership, it could be about anything. We're just craving some CONTACT right now. It's Friday afternoon and another weekend of non-stop hedonism is about to begin, you know, the usual thing: booze, ketamine, supermodels, designer labels, chinawhites, dogging, dancing, gambling, stealing, blowing cocaine up Pete Doherty's arse with a straw.....all the basics. But right now, we're just questioning whether this kind of activity has any real meaning, whether there's any real meaning to our lives??? Maybe you can tell us? Please, just say something.....anything.

On with the show.....

Your name & occupation?

Fraser James. Web developer but currently un-employed perfecting my "Sit and Go" strategy, looking for work again now though as a career in Poker seems a little optimistic and to be honest quite boring. I've got four years experience so if anyone's got a good job please get in touch.

Where do you live?

I live on the border between Islington and Dalston but close enough to Islington to be in the nice bit. There's Porsches and nice streetlamps outside. Despite the fact that the streets are nice and clean and they took my christmas tree away this year when I asked them, the council tax bill is still massive.

Which team do you support?

I grew up in the middle of nowhere in Cumbria and my closest football league team in a league was Milnthorpe Corinthians. Since I couldn't watch them on TV my brother said I had to pick another team. I chose the winner of a game between Newcastle and Liverpool, thankfully Liverpool won.

Your favourite player in London?

Has to be Frank Lampard Jnr. He scored so many goals this season and he's so bloody consistent. He's also going to help us win the World Cup this year and if he does, I'll love him forever, even if he does play for Chelsea.

If Joe Cole was an animal, what animal would he be?

He's really stupid isn't he? It seems that unless you tell him exactly what to do over and over again he'll just keep on running with the ball and won't stop, or do loads of tricks to please the crowds. For that I'd liken Joe Cole to a lemming. Although according to Wikipedia the myth of Lemmings becoming suicidal en masse and jumping of cliffs into the sea was created by Disney for the film White Wilderness. I liked the game though.

Your favourite place in London?

When I lived in Stockwell I used to love travelling over Vauxhall Bridge on the top deck of the 88 at night. My head wouldn't stop moving from side to side looking at all the great landmarks. I have to get a bendy-bus into town now and it really pisses me off that I can't pass the journey time looking at all the things you don't see from street level. When I was a kid my dad had an HGV licence so he'd sometimes do long trips delivering eggs for a friend who owned a egg-farm nearby. I used to love getting in cabin then and looking down on everything it was great... this is starting to sound like the JCB song so I'll stop now.

If you were to catch Dennis Bergkamp breaking into your place of residence, do you think that you could take him? How would you disable him?

His jaw is massive so I'd probably break my hand if I tried to punch him so I wouldn't do that. He scored that great goal against the Argentinians in '98 so I'd probably forgive him and let him get away with a little slap and a telling off. If needs be I would disable him with one of those blow-up planes that you get in duty-free.

Have you ever been sick on the tube?

No.

Thank you. And now for your predictions.

Arsenal v Bolton

Arsenal really are struggling this year, who could have thought the loss of one player could make that much difference. Sol's not playing so Alex Song is playing instead, I've never heard of him and i doubt you have either. The African Cup of Nations is over so Bolton get most of their squad back. Pascal Cygan is also injured which tips the balance back in favour of Arsenal. Lawro says 2-0 home win, I say draw.

Fulham v West Brom

God knows. Both average teams who seem to win every so often just keeping themselves above the relagation zone. Lawro says 2-0 home win, and I'll have to agree with him.

Middlesbrough v Chelsea

Middlesbrough are really on the slide and so it's a really great time for them to play Chelsea and they are gonna get whupped. Lawro never has any prediction which has one team scoring more than 2 goals so he's gone for a 0-2 away win. I'd agree with him but I reckon there's going to be more goals that that and maybe one or two more season ticket throwing incidents.

Man City v Charlton

Charlton spawned a win against Liverpool mid-week so they'll be thinking they're all great and being a bit cocky about the whole thing so I'm with Lawro on this one as well. Home win.

Sunderland v Tottingham

I don't know if Mido is playing after he made a right tit of himself in the African Cup of Nations. How smug must the Egyptian manager have been after that one. Lawro says 1-1 draw but Danny Murphys playing his first game since his shock move from Charlton so I'm going with him having a cracking game and Tottenham to prevail as victors. Away win.

Thank you Fraser and you stay classy, London.

Last Updated 10 February 2006