Big Brother: So, Craig's Out. Cry Us A River

By Jo Last edited 159 months ago
Big Brother: So, Craig's Out. Cry Us A River

Oh dear, Craig, you're out on your arse! The Londonist dungeon rang with shouts of glee as your eviction was announced, you wobbly-lipped sex pest. Managing a pitiful 4.1% of the vote, it really is a case of "Whatever, minger". Sod off back to East Angular and good luck with your chatshow idea. No, really, we mean it - it could be the worst best car crash viewing since Nigella.

Sorry if we're sounding a touch sour - must be the steady diet of lemons and vinegar - but it was galling watching far worthier housemates get the boot (we still love you, Science) while this creepy stalker swanned around, apparently immune to nomination. And look what happened when we had a chance to speak our minds! Let's repeat ourselves: 4.1%. Not a lot, is it? Davina was far too soft on Craig, too - blame time constraints (although it was worth giving up BB time for Lost, which was, as predicted, bloody fantastic). Why Craig won't come straight (!) about his sexuality is anyone's guess, and his denial of feelings deeper than friendship towards his beloved midget Geordie seems to stem from the if you tell a big enough lie, people will believe it precisely because it is so outrageous school of thought. Maybe he's cleverer than he looks.

In other news, our Eugene will walk out of the house a lot richer than he went in, thanks to his shock decision to accept half the winnings - that's £50,000, which will buy a lot of radio equipment. Had he turned down the money, the winnings would have been doubled - although he didn't know this at the time. Londonist is torn between congratulating him on his windfall, or lamenting the fact that, as Lancelot before him, our shining paragon of virtue, honour and chivalry has revealed his feet of clay. "It just goes to show, even I've got no morals," as the knight said to the king's wife. Or was it the bishop to the actress? Ant-knee is back as favourite to win again, boringly. Can't a geek win for once? Not that we're biased *cough* ...

A final gobbet of bleeding steak for thought: will BB be homeless next year? Say it ain't so! "It is reported that complaints to the council about noise have actually increased since the arrival of Kinga" ... hands up if that news surprises you. No-one? Thought not.

Last Updated 11 August 2005