Things To Do In London This Weekend: 18-19 March 2017

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We've got discount tickets for a fantastic new play, . Scroll down for details.

Swagger at Barbican's Chronic Youth film festival

BOOK AND SCREEN WEEK: London Book and Screen Week celebrates stories and the written word in all forms. Events taking place this weekend include backstage tours of the National Theatre, a writing masterclass with Will Storr and a film screening with a live score. See programme for full line-up. Various prices and locations, book ahead, until 19 March

ST PATRICK'S DAY: This year, St Paddy's is being celebrated with a three-day festival of live music, film screenings, talks and family events, culminating in the big parade on Sunday. Check out the full programme — and here's our guide. 17-19 March

YOUR EAST END: What does the East End mean to you? Explore your own and others' opinions on one of London's most diverse areas at this family friendly festival with crafts, workshops and performances. Museum of London Docklands, free, just turn up, 18-19 March

BIRTHDAY BASH: What's better than a normal birthday party? Why, a four day long birthday extravaganza of course. That's what Number 90 Bar & Kitchen is doing; expect DJs, bands, art installations, delicious food and creative cocktails. Number 90 Bar & Kitchen, free, just turn up 16-19 March

ASIA HOUSE FAIR: A bustling pop-up and colourful bazaar is how the Asia House Fair describes itself. Stock up on arts, crafts and foods from across Asia. The venue is just north of Oxford Street, but step inside and you'll feel a million miles from the high street. Asia House, free, book ahead, until 19 March

CHRONIC YOUTH: Barbican is hosting Chronic Youth film festival, focusing on bold and brutal coming of age films, and featuring a mix of cutting edge short films and old favourites. Barbican Centre, various prices, book ahead, 18-19 March

Saturday 18 March

See Neasden Temple in the Little India tour. Photo: Hemzah Ahmed

POCAHONTAS: The British Library is holding a packed day of film screenings, panel debates, a lecture and a musical performance exploring the cultural legacy of Pocahontas. British Library, £30/£21, book ahead, 9am-8.30pm

VEGAN MARKET: Head to Hackney Downs for a market packed full of ethical meat and dairy free food. Expect vegan donuts, vegan pie and mash, vegan cheeseburgers and — of course — vegan chicken. Basically it's all vegan. Eat Work Art, free entry, just turn up, 11am-5pm

SCIENCE MEETS SPORT: Imperial College and QPR join forces, to present a day of football, science and family fun. You can measure the speed of your fastest shot, find out what's really in sugary drinks, race robots and so much more. Imperial College White City Campus, free, book in advance, 11.30am-2.30pm

INDIA TOUR: Spend the afternoon in India, in north west London. Visit Neasden Temple, tour the colourful local markets, sample delicious chaat (Gujarati street snacks) and end the day in a simple sit down vegetarian cafe. Ealing Road, £25, book ahead, noon-2.30pm

CLASSIC CARS: The monthly classic car show and meet up returns to Lower Marsh Market in Waterloo. Admire these beauties, aged like a fine wine. There's a flea market going on in the area at the same time. Lower Marsh Market, free, just turn up, noon-4pm

FUNNY ARCHAEOLOGIST: Ask an archaeologist whatever random questions you have on digging up the past and they'll answer them as honestly as possible — often with hilarious results. Queen of Hoxton, £5, book ahead, 3pm-4pm

WHISKY POP-UP: Dram & Smoke are raising a Celtic glass to their Irish brethren for St Patrick's Day with a whisky and live music event. Receive a Talisker cocktail and snack on arrival at this Scottish knees-up. 584 Kingsland Road, £10, book ahead, 7pm-1.30am

COMEDY: Mae Martin, Lou Sanders and Jayde Adams are among the comedians on the bill at tonight's Knock2bag comedy night. Rich Mix, £10/£14, book ahead, 7pm

HAVEN'T STOPPED DANCING YET: This is a night of 70s and 80s soul, funk and disco, for people who remember the tunes first time round and still want to party. £15/£18, book ahead, 7.30pm-midnight


Don't miss your chance to grab tickets at a £10 discount for Seventeen — the critically-acclaimed play at the Lyric Hammersmith

is set after the end of the last day of school, when everyone's meant to move on. It's about the cusp of adulthood, the cusp of complete change.

But Seventeen is a coming-of-age story with a difference — one with some surprises up its sleeve...

If you want to come and watch it with fellow Londonist readers, we have a batch of tickets to the performance on 20 March. Even better, you'll get £10 off your tickets, with the best seats in the house for just £25.

For more details and to book your tickets, .


Sunday 19 March

The St Patrick's Day celebrations culminate today. Photo: Frida Fabbrini

LONDON PAINTINGS: An exhibition of paintings by artist Mike Bernard opens today. As well as scenes of Italian towns, Venetian canals and the Cornish coast, his renderings of London landmarks including Thames warehouses and Piccadilly Circus will be on display. Wimbledon Fine Art, free entry, just turn up, 19 March-2 April

ANTIQUES FAIR: Adams Antique Fair has been about since the 1970s, providing London with amazing collector's items. They're back on Sunday with over 140 stalls. The Royal Horticultural Halls, £4, book ahead or turn up, 10am-4.30pm

DICKENS MUSEUM TOUR: Charles Dickens and his young family have gone away for a weekend in the country. In their absence the reticent housemaid is up to her usual tricks. Instead of focusing on her duties, she's more interested in showing you around the house and divulging its secrets. Dickens Museum, £15/£12/£8, book ahead, 10.15am, 11am & 11.45am

ST PATRICK'S PARADE: Today's the day — the parade begins at noon, travelling from Piccadilly to Trafalgar Square, where the finale includes live music, comedy, street food, community stalls and more. Hop over to our guide for everything you need to know about St Patrick's Day in London.  Free, just turn up, from noon

SPRING MARKET: Spend your Sunday enjoying wine, craft beer and scrumptious food, and doing a touch of shopping. It's a collaboration from Burgess & Hall Wines, The Wanstead Tap and E7 Craft Collective. The Wanstead Tap, free, just turn up, noon-6pm

CABARET & TEA: Lauderdale House served as Waterloo Park's tearoom for 70 years, so they're bringing it back as an homage to their past. See some great cabaret from Nigel Richards and Sarah Dearlove alongside a delightful afternoon tea menu. Lauderdale House, £28.50-£14, book ahead, 3.30pm

20 YEARS OF POTTER: It's been 20 years since the publication of the now legendary Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. This is a chance for all Potterholics to see the first film next to one of its major locations, King's Cross. St Pancras Renaissance Hotel, £17, book ahead, 7pm-10pm

Funzing

Fun things to do with our friends and sponsor Funzing.

The Harry Potter Christmas Tour


Get sorted into one of the four magical houses of Hogwarts, and go in exploration of the city’s famous filming locations on this 2-hour walking tour. You’ll meet your guide outside the Palace Theatre, where Harry Potter and the Cursed Child is showing, and set off on your journey across town - following in the footsteps of Deatheaters, visiting the inspiration for Knocturn Alley, and marvelling at the Ministry of Magic. And you better brush up on your Potter knowledge, because you can earn points for your house along the way, by taking part in trivia quizzes. The winners? You’ll find out when the tour ends at Platform 9 3/4… Get tickets

Unveil the Full Body Orgasm This Christmas


Become more connected to your body and learn how to express yourself sexually is this workshop open to both males and females. Fully clothed and without touch, you'll learn how to utilise ancient practices to build a strategy to experience a full-body orgasm whenever you feel like it. For more information and to get tickets: http://bit.ly/2uhTZ5U (sponsor) Get tickets

East London Food Tour


Feast on the tastes of the East End... Chomp on pie and mash from a restaurant that's been open since 1900, and visit Russell Brand's not-for-profit café. There are seven stops in the food and drink tour across Shoreditch and Hoxton, so you better come hungry! Get tickets

Psychology of Attraction


Sex & Relationship mentor Colin Richards will will explain how our early life influences effect our attractions to others and our subsequent sexual behaviours. Colin will also then show you how by adopting a new way of listening and communicating, you can go a long way to overcoming repeated behaviour patterns to achieve the relationship and sexual connection you really want. Get tickets