Londoners are hardy creatures by nature, but there are some things that you just do not say to them. We asked you to tell us what those things are — are here's what you came up with.
Transport things
"Mind the gap!"
"It's alright the next tube is only in four minutes"
"I will stand where I like on the tube escalator!"
"The next tube is in three minutes..."
"Bank Station is tiny and easy to navigate!"
"Rail replacement bus service"
"The driver has been told to regulate the service"
"Why is it called Elephant & Castle?"
Food and drink things
"Can I have gravy with my pie and mash?"
"Do you want gravy on your chips?"
"Where's the nearest Pret?"
"You’re not gonna eat those beans right?"
Drink things
"I don’t drink tea"
"I can get a pint for under a fiver"
"Let's have a drink at Wetherspoons"
Polite things
"Good morning!"
"Hello!"
"Smile"
"I didn't try to skip the queue, I didn't know there was a queue!"
Car things
"These LTNs are a great idea aren’t they"
"ULEZ"
Direction things
"Where's Leicester Square?"
"Where do I catch the train to Paris?!"
Oxford Street things
"It's the Saturday before Christmas. Let's go shopping in Oxford Street"
"Let's meet at Oxford Circus at five"
It's a pretty big city things
"My friend Dave is from London, do you know him?"
Dog whistle things
"I could never live in London now, it's not the London I used to know" [usually followed by not so coded racism]
Touristy things
"Hi, I'm from America. Tell me, have you met the Queen/King?"
"I love the M&M shop"
"Crikey! It's like Piccadilly Circus here!" [When at Piccadilly Circus]
"I got us tickets to Winter Wonderland"
"St Pancreas"
I'm far too busy for that things
"My friends/cousins/strangers I met once/ are coming to London next week. I've said you'll put them up and show them the sights."
You just don't get it things
"When people say we can't possibly have any problems because we could just move somewhere cheaper."
Gentrification things
"It's brilliant that so many pubs have been converted into flats"
"Your rent is going up"
"I bought my flat in the early 2000s for 150k"
You look familiar things
"Were you in EastEnders?
You're not really from London things
"When are you moving back home?"
"Oh, but you don't have a cockney accent"
"Are you going home for Christmas, or are you staying in London?"
"Where are you from? ORIGINALLY?"
"You don't sound anything like Dick Van Dyke"
And finally...
"Anything at all, just leave us alone, we've got things to do"
Thanks to all our followers who chipped in with this one.
