The Epping Forest Guardian have revealed the best places in their catchment area for swingers, doggers and uninhibited sexmongers to congregate. Well, we say ‘revealed’. They simply compiled a list based on readily Google-able web sites. Nevertheless, it makes uncomfortable reading for much of the local populace. “Things like this don’t happen in Abridge,” says one lady, in denial after finding out that ‘things like this’ do indeed occur in Abridge. Also on the list are Gunpowder Park in Waltham Abbey, a ‘woodyard’ near the Wake Arms Roundabout in Epping, and the car park opposite the Camelot pub in leafy Chigwell. Hmm, we feel a Google Map coming on. If you’re thinking of engaging in a spot of al fresco rutting, the paper advises on staying clear of Epping Forest itself due to the ‘hard work’ of forest rangers who ‘tend to come down on people like a ton of bricks’. We’ll leave you to form your own jokes.