29 June 2017 | 16.6 °C

Yellow Peril

By sizemore Last edited 132 months ago
Yellow Peril
clarkson's phantom zone.jpg

Another occasion where our perception is at odds with the news:

Road junctions with yellow-painted no-stopping boxes that are enforced by cameras have greater congestion, as drivers are too worried about incurring a fine to pull forwards.

Rather than standing empty, we've yet to see a yellow box in the road that doesn't contain at least three cars all trying to get over each other in different directions with their drivers fucking this and cunting that. They make for great street theatre and coupled with a couple of ice creams and a deckchair amount to a fun afternoon.

Channel Four reckons that the problem lies with camera shy drivers. You'd think after wasting so much money on their metal heaps that drivers would love the attention - a little like having your photo taken on a log flume or something.

Still it's not all bad news as some 100,000 or so drivers have already been fined £100 each. That's enough money to pay for the whole of London to be painted inside a giant yellow box (just give Iain Sinclair a brush the next time he's out for a stroll) leaving plenty of room outside the M25 for the Clarksons to whiz around with each other.

Last Updated 12 June 2006