160 Londoners have been struck down by a menace that even the tightest of totalitarian legislation would have been powerless against - the humble kebab.
Environmental health officers have traced a trail of "severe diarrhoea, vomiting, fever and cold sweats" to a single kebab shop in Manor Park according to the Beeb. At one point ambulances had to be diverted to other A&Es and away from Newham hospital in scenes that must have resembled an end of season finale on ER.
So far 60 cases of Salmonella have been confirmed and Newham Council is considering legal action.
A spokesman for the shop identified at the centre of the outbreak said that they were "still busy", which just goes to show that NOTHING will stop drunken Londoners from lining lager drenched stomachs with their meat of choice.
The Standard has also picked up on the story with more grisly detail and quotes from those affected, including one poor chap who lost consciousness due to the poisoning. They also link to a 'related' story of a ten year old who choked to death on an unrelated kebab in Newcastle.