This Article Explains How Having A £70k Job In London Is Still Basically Like Being In A Ray Mears Show

Will Noble
By Will Noble Last edited 68 months ago

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This Article Explains How Having A £70k Job In London Is Still Basically Like Being In A Ray Mears Show

An article that appeared in The i neatly explains why we're all going to hell in an effing handcart. Here is why.

1. It's called "How I live on a £69,500 salary while saving to buy a two-bedroom flat"

Oh yes it is. 70 chuffing k, and it's meant to sound like some Ray Mears bullshit. It's genuinely great that a young woman like 29-year-old Kate works in the higher echelons of a construction company, and earns a fair whack too. However, it's equally depressing that while Kate's earning 2.5 times the average UK salary, that still means scrimping and saving for something that resembles approximately half a house.

2. "I’ve been saving £1,500 a month for almost a year to put towards a housing deposit."

OK, thanks Kate. That makes us feel very good about ourselves. Thanks.

3. "I used to only save around £800 per month but then stepped it up a notch."

Alright, Kate. Keep it down. Our mum's going to catch wind of this and ask why we're not putting away £1.5k a month.

This man will try to flog you a £150 gym membership. When he does, RUN

4. "Then I cancelled my £150 per month gym membership and started going running instead."

Sorry, a what-per-what gym what-bership? If we were offered the use of a few treadmills for anything remotely close to that price, we'd run an effing mile.

5. "I order less when I'm out now: in the pub I'll have two drinks and then drink water"

Nothing like ending a long hard week at your 70k job, with a few well-earned pints of tap water. Hopefully you get your round in early then, Kate. Don't be that person.

6. "I'll get food from a street market rather than pay for a pub lunch, which means I pay £7 rather than £16."

Specific.

Nothing like ending a long hard week at your 70k job, with a few well-earned pints of tap water.

7. "I avidly read the book Barefoot Investor and watched a Netflix documentary called Minimalism."

Come on, Kate, that's £9.99 you're spaffing on the monthly Netflix sub. Eyes on the prize. That lovely TWO BEDROOM flat you've been talking about.

8. "I live in Bethnal Green in East London and I’m hoping to buy a two-bedroom place near here, but I think I might have to settle for a one bedroom. We'll see!"

'We'll see!'? ''WE'LL SEE!'?! After scrimping £1.5k a month by subsisting largely off tap water and Netflix docs, you might have to downgrade to a ONE BEDROOM FLAT? Kate, we respect you and your thriftiness, but bloody hell. After all that. One bedroom. Bloody hell.

Last Updated 18 July 2018