Much is made of the annual swan upping ritual, in which the mute swans on part of the River Thames are rounded up, ringed and released.
It's all very ceremonial, all very pleasant, all very English.
But did you know that the Vintners Company — whose members still play a major part in that ceremony — also used to roast and devour swans? At a banquet held at their livery hall each winter, the carcasses of two cygnets were paraded up to the dining table by a gowned and capped Swan Warden along with a brace of cooks (you imagine them to look like Cookie from Matilda, except with blood, rather than chocolate stains), to the melody of six musicians playing a ballad on woodwind instruments.
The scene is straight out of the dogeared history books; the kind of medieval tableau you find woven into a tapestry; the recipes perhaps taken from the 1390 cookbook In The Forme of Cury: A Roll of Ancient English Cookery, which explains how to make "Chawdon for Swannes".
Except that this particular swan-scoffing dinner was reported in the Daily Express in 1927. And in fact, these dinners were still being hosted at least until 1960, when the London Evening News reported of another such feast courtesy of the Vintners Company — this one attended by the Duke and Duchess of Gloucester no less, their swan paired with a deliciously full-bodied burgundy.
The consumption of swans has indeed been going on for many centuries, and it always seems to be the well-to-do, privileged classes on record as eating them.
Of course, no one is eating swans anymore; not even our own Royal Family, who own a great deal of them. Swans are now protected under the Wildlife and Countryside Act 1981, and killing them is punishable by heavy fines and/or a spell in prison.
And then Reform leader Nigel Farage goes and claims that some immigrants are sneaking around London's Royal Parks, murdering and eating the swans.
It's not true, of course. Royal Parks has outright denied this is the case, and Farage himself hasn't provided one iota of evidence, instead arguing that people need to prove he's wrong. The RSPCA, meanwhile, says a video doing the rounds purporting to show people eating swans dates back 15 years.
Farage's claim is straight out of the Trumpian "they are eating the dogs" playbook; designed to stir division and hatred against groups of people who've done nothing wrong. There's an extra tang of Union Flag to this baseless claim, because these non-existent immigrants are targeting swans — you know, those noble beasts that occupy our beloved coats of arms and pub signs — in Royal parks — you know, the Royal Parks belonging to our dear Royal Family, where we all picnic on cucumber sandwiches while listening to Elgar.
Thankfully, the backlash has been full-throated; as well as dismissal from the Royal Parks, RSPCA and This Morning, more right-wing publications, such as the Spectator, have gone as far as commissioning Eastern Europeans like Piotr Wilczek to put the absurd claims to bed.
While nonsensical declarations like Farage's seem harmless enough, we've got to be on our guard. If enough people fall for such lies, democracy's goose could be cooked.
