Need a fresh wardrobe, dear Londoner? Look no further.
Show how much you love your city with one of these exclusive Londonist t-shirts.
From the classic 'Let Passengers Off First' to the tourist-baffling Krapy Rubsnif, there's something for everyone here.
T-shirts come in a range of colours and sizes, and are available for men and women.
We might be stating the obvious here, seriously, have you ever had a BAD Penge experience? Exactly. Inform those who should know better by wearing this in front of them and pointing repeatedly at it.
Either you get this or you don't. But seeing as you're reading Londonist, we'll assume you do. Not available in other names of fish.
Some people have been to Alton Towers. Some people have climbed Everest. This is far cooler.
Dish out this friendly advice to your fellow commuters by wearing this snazzy number.
Set an example to over-eager tourists by flaunting this beautifully illustrated tee.
Might take you a second or two to get this one. Unless, that is, you live near Krapy Rubsnif. Still struggling? Eulc a s'ereh.
Works on any escalator. Apart from Holborn, which has just gone standing only. We also find that people generally move out of your way when you wear this.
You've heard the automated caveat, now buy the t-shirt.
Impart sage advice AND prove you're a London know-it-all, without saying so much as a word.