Breaking news! Cabaret is now back in fashion; The Independent says so, so it must be true. Thanks for the heads up there, Independent, we would never have guessed all on our lonesome. Meanwhile, another broadsheet tells us that 65 anonymous cabaret stars are preparing to ascend to Edinburgh. We look forward to tracking down the unnamed damsel, magician and DJ.
But we digress. With zip, zero and zilch further ado, here are this week's Zingers.
Zinger Of The Week: Blue Stocking Society Presents... POPSTOCKINGS!, BGWMC (Thursday)
The much-loved series comes to an end for the summer with a bang as redheaded livewire Frisky (sans Mannish) chairs this month's meeting calling to order the likes of the Double R Club's Benjamin Louche, burlesquers Sienna Lately and Ooh La Lou, and singer Asya Satti plus Bluestocking founders Audacity Chuzpah and Tricity Vogue. Before they disappear somewhere north of the Watford Gap, they will be setting the world to rights with quirky cabaret, mirthful songs and the notorious raffle.
Monday's Zingers: If Timberlina hasn't melted over the weekend, the bearded beauty will be at the RVT's Bingo Night (free to get in, a pound per round) checking out the bronzed legs eleven while handing out naff prizes with charm and chuckles.
US import The Flying Karamazov Brothers (£29.50-£39.50) will be donning kilts and juggling whatever the audience asks them to (terms and conditions apply, your statutory rights are not affected). This is what we thought of them.
Tuesday's Zingers: Talking of going down, the Soho Theatre opens its new below-stairs area to the American award-winning star Justin Vivian Bond, ex- of pop revisionists Kiki & Herb. Crossing gender boundaries like a blind jaywalker, it will be interesting to see how Bond's solo work shapes up. Show starts tonight and continues until 9 July (£12.50-£20).
There's more sexual innuendo at dinnerclub Volupte as Tricity Vogue, the lovely lady with the ukulele, plays with her new show's titular Small Pink Instrument (£14+one course). She will be joined by ace juggler Mat Ricardo.
Spymonkey's Toby Parks and Petra Massey did a great job last month compering the Alternative Eurovision at the Udderbelly. They return to the venue with the rest of their crazy gang for a night of archaic cabaret (£15.50).
Wednesday's Zingers: "Last season ended with every audience member in the venue wearing a Tom Cruise mask, shouting out the poem from the movie Cocktail." The Bethnal Green Working Men's Club literary cabaret night returns with John Osborne, Tim Clare, Luke Wright, Ross Sutherland and Joe Dunthorne. It's called Homework, tickets are a fiver and they had us at "Tom Cruise mask".
Go, go Madame Jojo's tonight for burlesque mavens The Folly Mixtures who will be joined by hoopster Pippa The Ripper and the soon-to-be-joining-Fascinating-Aida Sarah-Louise Young. Tickets are £7.50 in advance and £10 on the door.
EastEnd Cabaret. Tonight. Cellardoor. It's as free as a bird not constrained by the laws of science.
Tonight you can go all experimental without doing yourself and/or your partner an injury by seeing Lab 10 at Leicester Square Theatre. Ten very different acts get ten very similar minutes to try out their new material. Price, unsurprisingly, is a tenner.
Thursday's Zingers: Look alive - it's your last chance to test your mettle against Northern controversialist David Hoyle at the RVT (£10). His guests, aerialist Empress Stah anders singer Dusty Limits, will be doing their best to escape in one piece.
You can also see Mr Limits at the black beast that is Madame Jojo's Bête Noire (£10) alongside circus boylesk Count Adriano Fettucini and host Ophelia Bitz. Lovely.
Friday's Zingers: If this week has left you yearning for a good night's kip, a lie-in and a cooked breakfast (preferably cooked by someone else), consider spending a night at the Barbican's Lullaby (£42). Brought to you by the team behind the RVT institution Duckie, you can choose to choose to nod off alone, with someone else or have your own menage a trois. And, why not?
We're probably repeating ourselves like history but La Reve at the Cafe de Paris really does go all out to put together high-calibre cabaret night every Friday. That man Limits is back on MC duties this week introducing (amongst others) Sarah-Louise Young, chap-hopster Mr B The Gentleman Rhymer, the sensuous Luna Rosa and aerialist Empress Stah, all at the reasonable price of £12 (show only) or £45 (show plus three course meal). Go.
It starts at 10:45pm (so good luck getting back to Zone 5 after the show) but Time Out Live's Friday Night Freakshow (£17.50/£16 conc) has a cracking line-up including the croonmeister himself Frank Sanazi, YouTubetastic Up 'n Over It, Alternative Eurovision winners Rayguns look Real Enough and crazy clown Chris Lynam.
Saturday's Zingers: As the denizens of Albert Square well know, you can only keep secrets for so long. The Magic Circle breaks a hundred years of silence with its Summer of Sorcery season. Tonight's revelatory show is entitled "Giants Of Close-Up Magic" (£25/£20) comes courtesy of Piff The Magic Dragon, Fay Presto, Michael Vincent, Peter Wardell and Jon Allen.
This week's tornado of tassels can be seen down at Hipsterville favourite The Shoreditch (ex- The Last Days Of Decadence) as Burlesque Baby (£10) have their graduation revue.
Sunday's Zingers: After Andy Murray loses three sets to two in a thrilling final against Rafael Nadal, feel free to try your luck at the Gay Bingo nights at the Soho Theatre with super alt-dragster Jonny Woo with his hand on the balls.
This week's video shows comedy juggler Mat Ricardo alternately entertaining and horrifying a Dutch TV audience. Take it away...