Danish Sperm To Invade London Wombs

Dean Nicholas
By Dean Nicholas Last edited 110 months ago
Danish Sperm To Invade London Wombs

2409_denmark.jpg An enterprising Danish company is offering sperm from the strapping sons of Denmark to childless Londoners. They're charging up to £1,000 for a premium-quality jar of Scandinavian jizz, and are targetting hospitals in wealthy areas such as The Lister Hospital in Chelsea where the kid-free can afford it.

The company, Cryos Denmark, is part of Cryos International, the world's largest network of sperm donors. They say a common Anglo-Danish "shared history" (a whole lotta raping and pillaging back in the day, and women weren't exactly queuing up for it) make their countrymen the ideal candidates to choke their chickens and help out London's broody and saucepan-bereft.

The numbers of British men lining up in clinics with a Kleenex and a well-thumbed copy of Loaded have halved since 2005, when the right of donor anonymity was removed, so this injection of Danish, er, bacon ("pork", surely? Ed.) is most welcome.

Last Updated 24 September 2009