With all tickets sold and a hefty payday in the offing, all Michael Jackson needs to do now is see about entertaining hundreds of thousands of rabid fans. Not a performer known for his stripped-down, back to basics live shows, details are already emerging about some of the more outlandish plans in store for attendees.
Evidently not convinced by the efficacy of the Jubilee line, Jackson and his entourage plan to arrive each night by river boat: a reference perhaps to the promotional work for 1996's HIStory album, which saw a towering statue of the singer float down the Thames. Jackson reportedly thinks that an aquatic arrival would be glamorous and "very James Bond"; Daniel Craig probably shouldn't worry about losing his lucrative gig just yet.
In other news, according to the Telegraph, the gigs could rope in a menagerie of beasts. Jackson has apparently requested the use of an elephant that he can ride on-stage during a jungle-themed sequence, while other sources indicate he wants to make use of monkeys, snakes, a panther, and various exotic birds. Said one hanger-on: "If it goes to plan it will look incredible." Yet we can't help but think of that well-worn adage: "never work with children or animals", a sprig of advice Jackson himself would have done well to adopt.
Speaking of which: the star, evidently looking to use the goodwill his sellout shows have brought, has made inquiries with a British adoption agency about adding to his brood. As if to demonstrate his child-rearing abilities, Jackson recently spoke about his love for the Harry Potter franchise, and in a totally non-creepy move has invited the young stars from the film to watch his shows with a special "access all areas" pass. Does the man never learn?
Radcliffe & co. shouldn't get used to the Prince of Pop's affections — we bet Macaulay Culkin doesn't even get a Christmas card nowadays.