The Frisky, a "daily romp on the wild side", hasn't been on our radar before but they've made believers of us with their list of the Seven Phallic Wonders Of The Modern World. A paean to the priapic, an
engorging engaging collection of modern erections to get the blood pumping , and one that has given us a post-coital glow, for a London landmark has been lovingly fingered among their collection.
It's not the Gherkin - the editors preferred Jean Nouvel's Barcelona knock-off, the Torre Agbar, which we'll concede does look a touch more sensuous than Sir Norman Foster's vegetable-inspired skyline shagger. Big Ben gets the nod instead, ahead of its City-based chum: according to the pun-tastic Frisky, it's like "a nickname you'd give a gifted lover who must mind the gap". Helpfully they do note that the name actually refers to the bell itself and not the C(l)ock Tower.
There's a definite niche in the adult market to be mined here. Ann Summers could produce a London landmark range of sexual aids - there are plenty of soaring buildings to draw inspiration from. Station names could be changed - imagine boarding a train from St Spank-Arse or Victoria's Secret. Beyond Ben and the aforementioned Gherkin, we think the impending Helter Skelter tower has definite vibrator potential. A pair of nipple clamps designed to look like the walkway above Tower Bridge could be a big seller, ditto Dita von Teese-style tassles that take the O2 for inspiration. And, after all, what modern lady wouldn't fancy introducing a Nelson to her Column.
Thanks to Stephen Cromwell for assistance with bad pun fun