If you're bothered, of a dull evening, by a drunk, leering man giggling and gurning at you with a suspicious (if meagre) bulge protruding from his pocket region, you'd be forgiven for force-feeding him a knuckle sandwich and sending him on his way.
Yet this was the nightly scenario visited upon one Staines resident. Ben Craft, a former karate trainer, found himself opening the door each evening to some clueless caller looking for a spot of 'ows yer father. The late night calls began last May, shortly after Mr. Craft, who lives with his partner Wendy, painted the front door green, and continued through the summer.
The mystery was finally solved this week when police raided another house on his street which had been operating as a brothel - a brothel which happened to share a similarly shaded front entrance to that of Mr.Craft's home, and was indeed named The Green Door.
Said the agreeable rather than aggrieved resident:
We made a joke of it, especially as I opened the door in my dressing gown once - I think I gave the guy a bit of a shock.. But, when I saw the police activity, the penny dropped.
The couple claim that it "doesn't bother them" what folk get up to in their homes, though to dissuade further nocturnal nookie-calls, they'll be painting the front door a different colour. A judo chop from the black-belted Mr. Craft might also get the message across.
Image from Ronald Hackston's Flickrstream via the Londonist pool