The Devil Really Doesn't Care That Much, thank you

By Craigie_B Last edited 117 months ago
The Devil Really Doesn't Care That Much, thank you
270508sean.jpg

To summarise: On Wednesday, a new novel is coming out about infamous fictional spy James Bond (aka 007). It's called Devil May Care and it's written by Sebastian Faulks.

That's it. Quite simple, really. Perhaps enough for a bit of press release? And maybe a nice drinks reception somewhere to meet some key reviewers, do a couple of interviews and help place a few pieces carefully in the right papers to generate 'buzz'? This is the first new official instalment of the series since Fleming's posthumous collection back in 1966. There Will Be Interest.

But no, that clearly wasn't enough. Here's what some giddy PR person left on their own in a dark cupboard managed to brainstorm instead:

1. Get a Royal Navy speedboat to nip down the Thames on Tuesday

2. Put a young blonde, busty woman in it, wearing a red PV catsuit

3. Have her carry 7 copies of Devil May Care, the new novel (7 - geddit?)

4. Arrange for two Lynx helicopters to escort the boat

5. Hold a launch event with the author on the HMS Exeter (tenuous link - where Bond apparently spent time as an intelligence officer)

6. Book some Fleming relatives to be present to give a shred of credibility to this tack-fest

7. Get the leggy model from the front cover to take 7 copies (oh, there's that 7 again) to Waterstone's on Piccadilly in a fleet of Bentleys

8. Generate a second spike in publicity on Saturday by getting tuxedo-wearing James Bond abseilers to scale down the front of Borders on Oxford Street

9. Get the afore-mentioned leggy model (no, not the author!) to sign copies at Borders

10. Drink several Martini's. On expenses.

11. Let the coverage roll in. Who needs news, anyway?

Some thoughts on this whole she-bang:

* This was all concocted by JK Rowling's marketing firm, Colman Getty. Stop this. Please. Just stop.

* We'll provide a prize for anyone who takes giant boxes of Milk Tray on Saturday to hand to the Bond abseilers. Nothing like mixing up brands to annoy someone back at Colman Getty.

* The book might actually be quite good, we just don't know. However, the fact the thing took just six weeks to write makes us less than confident. Plus the author won't be at his own book-signing and looked quite embarrassed at points today.

* Catsuits. Passé, no?

* Some Bond trivia for you - What is known about Bond from the books is online here: "At six feet and 165 pounds, Bond is slim, almost wiry (body mass index = 22.4). He has blue-grey eyes, a rather cruel mouth, a long vertical scar on his left cheek and short, dark hair which falls to his forehead in a wandering comma." See, Bond sells himself without all this flim-flam.

Gratuitous Sean pic taken in a charmingly handsome fashion from Truus, Bob & Jan too!'s Flickrstream

Last Updated 28 May 2008

esotericbadger

"the first new official instalment of the series"

Honest question, do Kingsley Amis / Robert Gardner not count? And if so, why not?

Kira

oh, this is just at the point of FLABBERGASTINGLY ridiculous. and laughable -- the AUTHOR isn't even the one signing the books, the MODEL is? o, what hath this industry wrought...

paulcox

I quite like the idea of handing boxes of Milk Tray to the abseilers -- I'll happily chip in for a prize for the brave soul to carry this out. But only if it goes on YouTube.

Siany

It's never about the book anymore is it? Sebastian Faulks' name behind this is more than enough to spark interest. But they have to turn it into a pantomime.

Besides, how Bond gets any work done after all those martinis is beyond me. I can't even stand after two sips of one.

Amanda Farah

Saw a copy in the shop window; apparently it's "Sebastian Faulks writing as Ian Fleming." I have a hard time believing someone with an already established career agreed to that billing willingly.

Lindsey

@ esoteric badger - Good point. Amis was 1968, Gardener 2002. Pearson in between in 1976 with "JAMES BOND: THE AUTHORIZED BIOGRAPHY, a fictionalised account in which Pearson interviews Bond as he looks back on his life". So - amendment noted - this is the first, official new instalment since then.