No matter what your opinion of the 2012 olympics, we're now all helpless to stop it and we won't be able to get away from it for five years so in a Stockholm Syndrome-like way we should all come to love our captors and get excited.
After a video treasure hunt across the web, today the branding was launched. How was it to represent London? Would it be all beefeaters and black cabs? The London eye? A binge drinker vomiting onto a pigeon?
We attended today's launch at the Roundhouse in Camden, attracted by the promise of a large multimedia presentation by Seb Coe and the added promise of celebrity - who would there be? Makosi from last year's Big Brother? Will Young? Sally Gunnell? We would have settled for just Gunnell.
Unfortunately Sally was nowhere to be seen. But we did get to see paralympic champion Tanni Grey Thompson, Kelly Holmes, Jamelia (who, to great applause, pledged to teach her children to swim), Jose Mourinho, who looked happy with his newly shaven head and mumbled something about how by 2012 he will be a real Londoner and Andrew Murray, who pledged to inspire young people although he looked so miserable that the only thing that he was inspiring anyone to do was to shake him. Also on stage was a pupil from a school in East London that sent a group of children to the vote in Singapore when London won the games. He seems to be the official child of the 2012 olympics and will no doubt be in rehab by age 17.
It was all very inspirational - "What do you want your children to achieve in 2012?" "Where do you want to be by 2012?" We threw up into our mouths a little when we were told by olympian Denise Lewis to "be the change we want to see". We were shown ever more inspirational video, Ken said something about how London's multiculturalism is "a model for the future of humanity" and then it was time to reveal the logo. We'll let you draw your own conclusions. All we'll say is that it'll look great on a glow-in-the-dark T shirt. If you love it and want the image as a background for your mobile phone, text "2012" to 80988. If you'd rather register your disgust, there is a petition here.
The logo design (which comes in four colours - orange, blue, pink and a horrible green) by Wolf Olins cost £400,000 to develop and took a year of research.
No news on the mascot yet. Our vote is for Steven Redgrave.
And finally, this Londonista will let you in on a personal secret...
Despite the fact that if you squint it looks a bit like a couple engaging in an act of oral sex and despite the fact that one of the Londonist co-editors described it as a "joke", I really like it. To those of you who agree with me - I fear we might be part of an oppressed minority for the next five years.
(highlight over the above gap to see it!)