Another day, another Hoff update. This time from Contact Music who reckon that a swooning hotel clerk saved David Hasselhoff's life by er... not swooning. Or something.
DAVID HASSELHOFF owes his life to a London hotel clerk who literally swooned at his feet seconds after he accidentally slashed his wrist in a shaving accent.
It's one hell of a shaving accident when it involves a chandelier - recalls the great shaving accident of 1970 when Japanese author Yukio Mishima accidentally disemboweled and decapitated himself. Back to Hoff:
he fears that if an overwhelmed clerk, who came to his aid after hearing his cries for help, had passed out in front of him, he would never have made it. He explains, "It was really early in the morning and I said, 'Help, help, please, and I went over with blood spurting everywhere, and she started to faint. "I said, 'No, no, no... don't faint.' I grabbed her with my foot and I said, 'Excuse me, can you tell me the number for 911 here in London.'"
Where to begin? We love Hoff for moving the emphasis of the story onto the heroic clerk who was overcome at the sight of so much celebrity blood, but to be honest if the man can grab a swooning girl with his foot while pumping out the claret then we also reckon he would have worked out our mysterious 911 number.
For any Americans reading this while shaving under a precarious chandelier the number you need is 999. That's the number of the beast upside down - spooky huh? We'd be careful about dialing it though because the police have a tendency to over protect you when it comes to health and safety issues of this kind...