It's a funny old world we live in, tearing down the information M25 waiting for the next speeding petrol tanker to flip itself over the central reservation right on to our unprotected heads. Terrified of losing control we've found a system that placates our every fear, that soothes our muddled minds, and gives us purpose outside of our living rooms. It is THE LIST.
We have lists for everything, for good guys and bad guys, for shopping and dropping; we're almost at the stage where we can rewrite the old Koan: if an item's not on a list does it really exist?
Not only do lists pacify our perpetually panicked existence but they also formulate room for debate. They are presented to us by either people who know or by people who don't. In the case of the former we suffer their boorish self obsessed superiority, recommendations of unlistenable-unwatchable-unreadable garbage, and a crushing sense of our own dimwitted worthlessness. For the latter a blinding realisation of how superior we are to the tasteless plebs next door and in doing so become the former. Lists are guaranteed to start arguements and that's why we love them.
Being a bank holiday coming up there's bound to be more than a few top 10s, top 20s, bottom 30s and top 100s hurtling around the tv schedules but we're really looking forward to hurling abuse at the massed ignorance of the XFM listening population (ourselves included) as they unravel the 2005 Shortlist on Monday: the 104 best indie tracks ever. They will of course be the best ever because you, the people, voted for them, and can continue to vote for the final placings - sort of like the Big Brother final but with smaller egos - for the next couple of days.
The list, which we've cribbed wholesale for you over the page reads, as you might expect, like pretty much any 'best of indie' cd compilation currently doing the rounds. Made up of classic cliches (Wonderwall), cliched classics (The Passenger) and whatever's popular right now (Kaiser Chiefs) there are few surprises - lots of Oasis, a few surprises - the Mooney Suzuki, and a surprise few - where are the Beatles? You'll only be surprised if Smells Like Teen Spirit isn't number one or two and if Caesars are in the running next year.
For the sake of kick starting an arguement for arguements sake we'll ask why Explosions In The Sky's Your Hand In Mine, The Dandy Warhols' cover of Hells Bells and Elbow's Grace Under Pressure aren't there and two songs by The Smiths are! Ire, rage, anger and alternative lists on the comments board please.
AC/DC - Back In Black
Ash - Girl From Mars
Athlete - Wires
Beastie Boys - Sabotage
Bloc Party - Banquet
Blur - Parklife
Blur - Song 2
Blur - There's No Other Way
Buzzcocks - Ever Fallen In Love
Caesars - Jerk It Out
Charlatans - One To Another
Charlatans - The Only One I Know
Clash - London Calling
Clash - Rock The Kasbah
Coldplay - Clocks
Coldplay - Yellow
The Coral - Dreaming Of You
Cult - She Sells Sanctuary
The Cure - Boys Don't Cry
The Cure - Inbetween Days
The Darkness - I Believe In A Thing Called Love
David Bowie - Heroes
David Bowie - Life On Mars
Depeche Mode - Enjoy The Silence
Doves - There Goes The Fear
Echo & The Bunnymen - The Killing Moon
Electric Six - Danger! High Voltage!
Feeder - Buck Rogers
Foo Fighters - Everlong
Foo Fighters - Monkey Wrench
Franz Ferdinand - Take Me Out
Green Day - American Idiot
Green Day - Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life)
Guns N Roses - Sweet Child O' Mine
Iggy Pop - The Passenger
The Jam - Going Underground
Jeff Buckley - Grace
Jimi Hendrix - All Along The Watchtower
Jimi Hendrix - Purple Haze
John Lennon - Imagine
Johnny Cash - Hurt
Joy Division - Love Will Tear Us Apart
Joy Division - Transmission
Kaiser Chiefs - I Predict A Riot
Kasabian - L.S.F
The Killers - Mr Brightside
The Las - There She Goes
Led Zeppelin - Stairway To Heaven
Led Zeppelin - Whole Lotta Love
The Libertines - Don't Look Back Into The Sun
The Libertines - Time For Heroes
Manic Street Preachers - A Design For Life
Manic Street Preachers - Motorcycle Emptiness
Massive Attack - Unfinished Sympathy
Mooney Suzuki - Alive & Amplified
Morrissey - Everyday Is Like Sunday
Muse - Hysteria
Muse - Muscle Museum
Muse - Time Is Running Out
New Order - Blue Monday
Nirvana - Heart-Shaped Box
Nirvana - Smells Like Teen Spirit
Nirvana - The Man Who Sold The World
Oasis - Champagne Supernova
Oasis - Cigarettes & Alcohol
Oasis - Live Forever
Oasis - Supersonic
Oasis - Whatever
Oasis - Wonderwall
Pearl Jam - Alive
Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here
Pixies - Debaser
Pixies - Where Is My Mind?
Placebo - Nancy Boy
Pulp - Common People
Radiohead - Creep
Radiohead - Fake Plastic Trees
Radiohead - Just
Radiohead - Paranoid Android
Radiohead - Street Spirit (Fade Out)
Razorlight - Golden Touch
Red Hot Chili Peppers - Scar Tissue
Red Hot Chili Peppers - Under The Bridge
REM - Losing My Religion
Rolling Stones - Paint It Black
Sex Pistols - God Save The Queen
Smashing Pumpkins - Today
Smiths - How Soon Is Now?
Smiths - There Is A Light That Never Goes Out
Snow - Patrol Run
Specials - Ghost Town
Stone Roses - Fool's Gold
Stone Roses - I Am The Resurrection
Stone Roses - I Wanna Be Adored
Strokes - The Modern Age
Suede - Animal Nitrate
U2 - Vertigo
U2 - With Or Without You
Undertones - Teenage Kicks
Verve - Bittersweet Symphony
Weezer - Buddy Holly
White Stripes - Seven Nation Army
The Who - Won't Get Fooled Again
Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Maps
