Peckham: Shittier Than Somalia Apparently

By Rob Last edited 162 months ago
Peckham: Shittier Than Somalia Apparently
Love peckham.jpg

On this rainy, miserable morning we couldn't resist pointing you in the direction of UK Resistance, a gaming site that is absolutely, definitely not a blog (see, they make a point of telling you it's not a blog so it can't be).

The latest article on UK Resistance is a highly informative piece on a new games shop in Peckham. The excitement derives from the fact that the shop is called GamesMaster and, as we all know, "back in the early-to-mid-1990s there was a TV show about games on TV called 'GamesMaster' that was really good, despite it never featuring enough Sega games in its challenges."

A TV show about games on TV?

Anyway...the article quickly descends into a socio-political disection of Peckham that is one of the greatest things we've read on the internet in a long time. For example, this is the introduction:

Peckham is a part of London people pretend doesn't exist. It's like a lump you find on your body, then ignore and hope it goes away on its own. The residents are scared to go outside, but at least they all have satellite TV for something to do!

As you'll see, it really sets the tone for the rest of the article.

Peckham is easily the shittest place in the whole world, including places like Afghanistan and Somalia...Every time we walk through Peckham we expect to get offered drugs, murdered for drugs, searched for drugs or ground up into powder and used as drugs...If you have shoes that cost more than ten pounds in Peckham you are considered to be a KING..."

Pretty strong stuff. But they've saved their real wrath for the shopping complex in which GamesMaster is located, the Aylesham Centre:

This is Peckham's idea of a shopping centre. Walking into it feels like being a homosexual and walking into a bar in Texas with a pink t-shirt on. Even in the North of England, like Watford or Hemel Hempstead they have nicer shopping centres than this.

And one final piece of advice for anyone considering buying something in Peckham:

There's not many people buying things in GamesMaster in Peckham. That's because if you buy anything in Peckham you get it stolen off you immediately as you leave. It's like a really harsh tax system designed to keep the poor in their place (Peckham).

Last Updated 27 July 2005