GTA: <i>Nice</i> City

By sizemore Last edited 228 months ago

Last Updated 20 April 2005

GTA: <i>Nice</i> City
congestion_clarkson2.jpg

The Times is warning in a headline that Driving across London and back may soon cost you £15. We have no idea what they're talking about as it only costs us £1.20 (80p with prepay)... oh hang on... they're talking about driving in a car.

Our mistake. We tend to forget that there are people in those strange metal things that get in the way of the buses and try to kill people on bikes.

The Times reckons that drivers face charges of up to 80 pence a mile under plans by Transport for London to halve congestion across the capital. They go on to get fluffy dice owners all in a lather over the idea of having to pay extra for the privilege of making London that little bit more unbearable for the rest of us.

Buy an iPod and an Oyster Card - much cheaper than a car and you can drink as much as you like while navigating your MP3s without worring about kids bouncing off the little screen.

The proposed new charges will unfortunately hinge on equipping cars with satellite tracking devices and then implementing a new tracking system. We've yet to see any government or authority launch a successful new bit of technology as they tend to go for the lowest bidders and end up with some cheap knock off that isn't quite what they expected. Like when Londonist asked for a Transformer for Christmas in 1986 and got a crappy Gobot instead.

The money generated, somewhere in the region of a £2 billion profit, would be invested in new transport schemes. We'd like to see Sky Captain style zeppelins, but we'd make do with some new trams and trains.