Londonist hasn't had any interest in the word of pro-wrestling since we were about eight (and we only watched it then because all our mates did). But this story of an American wrestling 'star' who was convicted of "causing unnecessary suffering to a 12-foot python" at his former home in Hertfordshire, seemed too good to pass up.
Jake the Snake Roberts, whose real name is (don't laugh) Aurelian Smith Junior, was accused of keeping the python (real name: Damian) in a small Perspex cage in the garage of the house that he shared with his gran.
The snake was "severely underweight and had mites and a serious mouth infection" all of which eventually led to its death from pneumonia.
During the trial it also emerged that Aurelian Smith Junior actually had a phobia of snakes.
A warrant has now been issued for the arrest of Aurelian Smith Junior and police know exactly where to find him: he is due to perform in a squash club in Dunstable next Saturday.
So let's just sum up this story: A 49-year-old pro-wrestler whose gimmick is snakes, was actually a man named Aurelian Smith Junior who lived with his gran and had a phobia of snakes. Plus he didn't know how to look after them, and now he's performing at squash clubs in Dunstable.
Maybe we'll have to start watching wrestling again. Sounds like a lot of fun.