(Not The) Royal Wedding Live Blog

In a change from Londonist protocol, we’re looking beyond the capital today. This live blog will cover anything and everything happening in the world, except for the royal wedding.

And on that note, we’ll call it a day for the live blog, as those other events (which may not be mentioned) draw to a close. Thanks for reading!

13.28pm New goat born at Spitalfields Farm!

13.07pm Space shuttle Endeavour is undergoing fuelling for its final flight this evening.

12.44pm Hospitals may have to make efficiency savings 50% greater than already demanded, according to a curiously timed announcement.

12.36pm Protests begin in Syria, one week after over 100 demonstrators were killed by government troops.

12.25pm Time for some hyperlocal news. Topeka, Kansas scores top marks for air quality, McDonalds in Butte, Montana will be rebuilt following a fire, and Lincoln fans will get a free ride to their game against Oxford tomorrow.

12.15pm Seven-foot snake found in Oxfordshire woods.

11.58am Cyclists: head to the Southbank, under Waterloo Bridge, at 6pm tonight for the monthly Critical Mass bike ride.

11.47am Ear-biting incident in Perth. It’s all happening.

11.38am Plenty on at the East End Film Festival today.

11.21am Heading to Bournemouth? Watch out for these dangerous headache-inducing caterpillars.

11.04am Want to catch a movie? Horror flick Insidious opens today.

10.56am Tensions grow on the Thai-Cambodia border as the two sides exchange fire. 16 people have died in the ongoing dispute.

10.51am Shall we throw in another plug for our maps exhibition at the Museum of London? Oh, go on, then. The Independent gave it a rave review today.

10.41am China joins the long list of countries and regions who don’t like Salman Rushdie very much. The novelist dubbed the country ‘the world’s biggest threat to freedom of speech’.

10.30am Ken Livingstone has chosen to spend the morning in Costa, West Hampstead, says @lakey on Twitter.

10.15am Snooker’s started. Judd Trump versus Ding Junhui. Odd that’s it’s not being carried on BBC1.

10.08am Despite his ever-so-slightly evil-sounding name, General Patraeus is appointed head of the CIA.

9.54am More clashes between police and protesters in Bristol, where locals have taken umbrage at a new Tesco store.

9.35am You can’t beat a good ‘x is dirtier than a toilet seat’ story. Today’s revelation is that car steering wheels are up to nine times more bacteria-ridden than loo seats (according to an unreferenced study by scientists at Queen Mary University, London).

9.25am Apple made more money last quarter than Microsoft, thanks to strong iPad sales.

09.15am A special shout-out to the Roatary Club of Chichester Harbour, who begin a 180 mile bike ride from their home town to Chartre, in support of Bowel Cancer UK. Best of luck, folks.

9.07am Here in London, FIVE police community support officers have been sacked for visiting a Soho brothel while on duty.

9.00am Over in the States, Superman is threatening to renounce his US citizenship, following a spat with the Iranian government.

8.51am On a more positive, thrusting note, the other big event planned for today is the launch of Endeavour space shuttle, on its final flight. The orbiter is due to take off around 8.45pm UK time on a mission to the International Space Station. Space.com are always good for coverage. We’ll keep an eye on preparations.

8.45am Important developments are expected in Syria today, where demonstrators angry at the government’s heavy-handedness plan a ‘day of rage’.

8.38am The day begins with tragic news from the southern United States. The death toll from a series of tornadoes now stands at 297, mostly in Alabama. President Obama will visit later today.

8.30am Welcome to our live blog. Our coverage of the day’s events will begin shortly. Twitter hashtag for the day is #nottheroyalwedding

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