Westfield shopping centre in Shepherd's Bush is the setting for a new 'Selfie Factory' β a nirvana of bathtubs overspilling with coloured balls, a 'confetti cove' and walls peppered with fake plastic doughnuts. This, according to the website, is the chance to "capture the best photos of your life!"
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Sure, we're not the demographic for this, but the question must be asked: does London really need a selfie factory at all? After all, isn't our city one big selfie factory? Beefeaters, Tower Bridge, Madame Tussauds, parks exploding with summer blooms, red phone boxes... Why you'd pay Β£10 for the pleasure of sinking into an Astroturf armchair and 'answering' a phone call from no one on an unplugged rotary dial phone, we're not sure. And Β£20 for the pleasure of unlimited selfie purgatory for the day β occasionally slipping into trunks or swimsuit for variety β boggles the mind. We must be getting old.
The term 'selfie' seems to be used loosely too β nearly all of the shots taken in the publicity snaps appear to have been taken by other people. If you want that money shot of yourself being smothered by an oversized teddy bear, you'll need a willing partner in crime.
Perhaps we're being too harsh. Things like this must be a lifeline to parents dragging bored summer holiday kids around the shops for half the day. Β£10 is probably a bargain for 60 minutes of grumble-less retail therapy. Let's just hope the hordes of influencers play nicely, and let the kids have a go on that rotary phone.
The Selfie Factory is at Westfield, Shepherd's Bush from 1-16 August 2019. General admission is Β£9.99, unlimited day passes are Β£19.99.