Things to do today is sponsored by the Houses of Parliament.
What we're reading
- A comprehensive look at why Uber hasn't had its license renewed.
- Mary Berry helps the Freemen of the City celebrate their right to drive sheep over London Bridge
- Parliament is advertising the position of Black Rod with a healthy paycheck of up to £93,000
- Met police have prevented seven terror attacks in London since March
- Not so much reading as watching — the bell ringers of Saint Giles Camberwell church show you how it's done
Things to do
RAINDANCE: It's the 25th year of Raindance Film Festival, showcasing over 250 of the best independent shorts, features, documentaries, web series, music videos and VR experiences from all over the globe. Discover a multitude of on screen action before they gain cult followings. Until 1 October. Vue Leicester Square, various prices, book ahead, various times
HEALTHY ART: Ben Uri's new exhibition Using Art Differently engages with the idea that art can support and improve mental and physical health by exploring universal themes of identity and migration. Until 15 October. Ben Uri Gallery & Museum (St John's Wood), free, 10am-5.30pm
ROBOT ZOO: This family-friendly exhibition is larger-than-life with some pretty impressive mechanics to boot. Try jet-propelled squid racing, shoot a chameleon's 'tongue-gun' and even design your own 'mutant' robot creature. Horniman Museum and Garden, £4/£7, just turn up, 10.30am-5.30pm
FUNNY FEST: It's the last day of the Objectively funny festival. There's a wide range of acts to enjoy, from TV panel show stars to cult heroes. Remember it's funny. Objectively so. The Albany, £1, book ahead, 2pm-1am
BLOODTHIRSTY MURDER: Victorian London was home to the heights of gentle femininity, but an underbelly of female career criminals existing in parallel included Kate Webster, a petty criminal turned bloodthirsty murderer. Track her transformation with professor Anne Marie Kilday. Guildhall Library, £5.90, book ahead, 6pm-8pm
DRONE FESTIVAL: Drone footage is becoming incredibly popular, both in YouTube videos and mainstream film and TV. Despite the fact that drones are forbidden to fly in London, the 2nd annual London Drone Film Festival is held here, showcasing just how amazing this technology can make your latest project look. Institute of Contemporary Arts, £20, book ahead, 6pm-11pm
SMALL HILLS: Looking for a hill to climb or an outdoor adventure? Well, why not join author and award winning travel writer Phoebe Smith as she discusses her new book Britain's Best Small Hills? Stanfords (Covent Garden), £4, book ahead, 6.30pm-7.45pm
WONDER WOMAN: In a celebration of women in film, Vauxhall Pop Up Cinema club are screening blockbuster hit Wonder Woman, preceded by a Channel 4 Random Acts thrree minute film directed by a woman, and followed by an audience discussion hosted by Oscar winning film producer Mia Bays. The Workshop, £5/£7/£10, doors open at 7pm
SCIENCE OF SLEEP: People underestimate how important sleep is, and how much they need, especially us busy bee Londoners. Sleep scientist Matt Walker discusses how to shift our values and habits around sleep, and recognise that sleep is the single most effective thing we can do for our health and wellbeing. Royal Institution, £7/£10/£16, book ahead, 7pm-8.30pm
RIVER OF BEER: No, some pop-up in Shoreditch hasn't manufactured an artificial river of beer for you to slosh in. But you can learn the role that the Thames played in the history of brewing in Britain; with historian Martyn Cornell. The Pier House, £3, book ahead, 7.30pm
How does afternoon tea at the Houses of Parliament sound?
With tours and teas available on most weekdays until 7 October and every Saturday, Parliament is well-worth exploring — whether you’re an aspiring politician, into history, or just want to check out the stunning architecture. Step behind closed doors and get the inside scoop on what goes on in the Commons and the Lords.
Learn all about the Speaker’s chair and Prime Minister’s Questions before indulging in an afternoon tea with a difference. After a guided tour, it doesn’t get much better than a House of Commons scone with clotted cream and strawberry jam while gazing upon glorious views of the Thames. Find out how to book here.
Food review: top burger with a side of Tower Bridge
There is nothing quite like munching on a deluxe burger with a view of Tower Bridge. Butler's Wharf Chop House sits on prime real estate with an incredible view of London's favourite Thames crossing, so snagging a table outside is an absolutely must. Their thick and juicy burger comes in a brioche bun, fat potato-y chips and red pepper and tomato chutney, but of course we had to go the whole hog and add cheese and bacon as well. While some may feel £15.50-£19.50 for a burger is on the pricey side — even for London — the sun setting over the Thames and the spectacular view made the cost worth it for a special evening out. For dessert there's the deliciously sweet vanilla ice cream, which — as you might expect from Chop House — tasted richly of vanilla beans. There are a few other locations in their franchise, so if you're tired of Thames-side dining, perhaps you'd instead like to chow down a burger at their St Paul's location; the setting for TV's First Dates. Butler's Wharf Chop House, 36e Shad Thames, SE1 2YE ★★★★☆ [Monday-Sunday] Eleana Overett
Art review: a trippy mural
Samantha Bittman's mixtures of weaving and painting mess with our eyes, a massive floor to ceiling mural is easy to lose ourselves in. Best to go with it and find yourself sucked into her mesmerising works. Samantha Bittman: Shift at Ronchini Gallery, 22 Dering Street, W1S 1AN, free. Until 28 September ★★★☆☆ (Monday-Saturday) Tabish Khan
Theatre review: lipstick, powder and paint
Watching a make-up demo for a group of bereaved mothers whose children died in a national tragedy, while timely, isn't the most enticing night out. Ignore any misgivings though. This is a knockout piece. Set eight months after the 1966 Aberfan disaster which left 116 children dead, Neil Anthony Docking's play is as emotionally taught as you'd expect but also surprisingly warm and funny. The five actresses are all equally strong and the manifestations of grief are convincingly explored in a play that captures the period perfectly. Just remember to pack a hankie. The Revlon Girl, Park Theatre, Clifton Terrace, Finsbury Park, N4 3JP, £16.50-£18. Until 14 October ★★★★☆ (Tuesdays to Saturdays) Chris Bridges
Good cause for the day: forgetting but not forgotten
The Angel Comedy Club is bringing the funny side of life to the fore by putting on a live comedy benefit Forgetting But Not Forgotten, raising money for the Alzheimer's Society to continue their incredible work researching into the cause, prevention and cure of dementia. 2 October, Angel Comedy Club, £10, book ahead, 8pm-10pm
Fun things to do with our friends and sponsor Funzing...
Fancy some Dim Sum fun? From making and rolling the dough to preparing the fillings and forming the parcels, William will show you everything you need to know to become a Dim Sum pro. William will also teach you the etiquette of Dim Sum - learn what to order and how to order, in Cantonese! Get tickets
Could you spent hours on end satiating your morbid curiosity by researching serial killers? Hey, you're not alone. Insight into the criminal psyche is a fascinating topic and one covered in this talk by retired police officer, Paul Harrison. You'll encounter the stories of three of the UK's worst serial killers, from their childhoods to their crimes. With over four decades of experience in the Criminal Justice system, join Paul to work through the facts, uncover the details, and get inside the heads of these killers to discover what truly motivates a murderer. Get tickets
Ever fancied yourself as Robin Hood? Join the 2020 archery team in London Bridge and discover how to shoot. The 1.5 hour 'get started in archery' class will teach you how to shoot (relatively) accurately as well as the scoring system and key archery terminology. The session finishes with a mini-competition where you can show off your new-found skills. Get tickets
We all know Soho is changing - and fast. But does the Soho of decades past - fiercely independent, occasionally seedy, always flamboyant - still exist? Antony Robbins claims it does - if you know where to look. A former director at the Museum of London, Robbins now leads walking tours of Soho, delving into the area's past and present. His Sex, Death and Shopping tour covers scandals of yesteryear through to present-day erotica - taking in hidden gardens, sinister histories, and little-known facts of famous places. A bit sinister. A bit salacious. And exceedingly well-tailored. It's a tour to have you falling in love - or lust - with this part of London all over again. Get tickets