Forget The Crystal Maze: We Want To See These London Gameshows

M@
By M@ Last edited 75 months ago
Forget The Crystal Maze: We Want To See These London Gameshows

numberwang

With the continued popularity of London's live Crystal Maze game, we wondered what other gameshows might grace the capital.

Family Fortunes

Boris, Jo, Stanley and Rachel Johnson go head to head with Cara, Poppy, Pandora and Charles Delevingne in a daily contest to see who can occupy the most pages of the Evening Standard. Occasional guest appearance by Lily Cole.

What's My Line?

Panel quiz show in which Jilly Cooper, Barry Cryer and a resurrected Willie Rushton are introduced to a succession of London commuters. By analysing odour, degree of dishevelment and response to the words 'signal failure', the panel must attempt to work out which tube or train line the passenger uses.

Bankety Bank

Variation on the 'locked room' game. You find yourself on the Northern Line platforms at Bank and have to negotiate your way to the surface without accidentally catching the Central Line or somehow emerging at Monument. Impossible.

strictBexley Come Dancing

Geographically limited dance-off sees Bexley take on Bexleyheath in the Broadway Shopping Centre. Tickets still available.

Pointless

See Emirates Air Line.

Pinner Takes Ball

In a peculiar rehash of 80s favourite Winner Takes All, Jimmy Tarbuck leads a weekly purge of Harrow School's sporting facilities. Captured balls are then rolled down the hill towards the charming village of Pinner.

Play Your Cards Right

Participants must uncover the correct loyalty card from a wallet full to the brim of loyalty cards before the customer behind starts tutting. Daily game played by every lunching Londoner.

A Question of Penge

Ill-advised, severely limited quiz format in which all the questions relate to the Bromley conurbation of Penge.

questionpenge

Eel of Fortune

Players dressed as Cockneys take turns to spin a wheel in the shape of the London Eye. Sometimes the wheel comes to rest on cash prizes. Other times, the contestant will have to take part in an eel-based forfeit. The player might have to swallow a batch of jellied eels, submerge himself in a tank of live electric eels, or kill a dozen elvers using only her teeth. Wretched entertainment.

Fifteen to One

The game where commuters try to find a Southern train that's on time.

Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?

Anyone who aspires to buy a mildewed shed in Zone 1. That's who.

The Weakest Link

Is it Thameslink or Tramlink?

weakest copy

It's Thameslink.

Mornington Crescent

Obviously.

Last Updated 13 December 2017