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BLOOD: Today’s opportunities to donate blood are at The Hop Exchange in Southwark Street and York House in Twickenham. Free, see site for terms and conditions
HALF TERM: Keep the kids entertained with our list of half term activities, including code-breaking and a ship sleepover.
NEW EXHIBITION: Strange Beauty: Masters of the German Renaissance is The National Gallery's new exhibition, which opens today. It focuses on the way perceptions of German Renaissance portraits have changed over time. £8/£7, prebook, until 11 May
SHAKESPEARE: Learn about the archaeology of Shakespearean theatres and the excavation of The Rose Theatre at this half-day course led by Geoffrey Toms in Audley Square. £44, prebook, 10.45am
HORTICULTURE: As she comes to the end of a year as Acting Head Gardener at Fulham Palace, Lindsay Schuman talks about her time in the role. £8/£5, prebook, 6pm
LONDON MUSINGS: Author Travis Elborough and writer Max Décharné have both written about London in different capacities. Tonight at Waterstone's Piccadilly's Writing London: Stranger Than Fiction event they come together to discuss their strangest stories about the city. Free, prebook, 7pm
BONES TALK: PubSci's first event at their new venue, Old King's Head in London Bridge, sees Ben Garrod, TV presenter and primatologist, talking about his research in bones and the evolutionary adaptations of primates, coinciding with his new TV series Secrets of Bones. Free (donations accepted), just turn up, 7pm
ART TALK: Artist and sculptor Richard Fleischner discusses his current exhibition and his way of making art with curator and writer Ben Tufnell at the South London Gallery in Peckham. £5/£3, prebook, 7pm
LIVE MUSIC: We're loving the work of indie band Emperor Yes, who have their own beer and are obsessed with history. As for their music, they're playing at Barfly in Camden tonight, along with Sam Duckworth and Rad Stewart. £7, prebook, 7pm
POP-UP PAINTING: For your chance to create your very own Banksy fake, go along to PopUp Painting's workshop at Troyganic in Shoreditch, where you'll be able to create your own version of Girl With The Balloon. £25, prebook, 7.30pm
BEL-AMI: New musical Bel-Ami launches at the Charing Cross Theatre today, based on the book of the same name and by students from London College of Music and University of West London. £12, prebook, 7.30pm
COMEDY: It’s a packed night with Knock2Bag at Bar FM in Shepherd’s Bush. Brian Gittins headlines, supported by Norwegian deadpanner Daniel Simonsen, Joseph Murpurgo, Tom Davis, Don Biswas, Aisling Bea and musical genius from Jonny and the Baptists. £8+bf, prebook, 7.30pm
MUSIC READINGS: The Ivy House in Nunhead hosts Queer Tales, an evening of music-themed readings that celebrates LGBT history month, featuring different writers and authors. Donations welcome. Free, just turn up, 7.45pm
Bermondsey start-up Pact Coffee is on a mission to get London drinking better, fresher coffee. Get your first 250g bag of hand-roasted coffee delivered to your home or office for only £1 with free P&P. Just use the code londonist14 at checkout. For more info and T&Cs click here.
Good Cause of the Day
The Kennington Bioscope hosts its latest event at the Cinema Museum. The programme is a bit mysterious but it will be presented by Amran Vande, who is an avid collector of silent films and is the organiser of the London Silent Film Meetup. There is a suggested donation of £2 to the Cinema Museum. Prebook by email.
London Connection Puzzle
Yesterday's clue was LADBROKE GROVE. Today's is STREATHAM. Many things connect these two: "they're both places in London", for example, or "They both have a Starbucks" (we presume). But we're looking for something more specific. If you think you've got it, email email@example.com with your answer. Otherwise, a third clue will appear tomorrow.
From the Archive
Do you know your korfball from your kickboxing? We hope so, for the sake of all who cross your path. Find all London-based 'k' sports here, part of our Where To Play Sport In London alphabetical series in 2013. Surely there is something that floats your kayak?
It's 'Lewd and Rude' week on Londoddities. For day three, we proudly present this magnificent walrus penis bone, on show at the Grant Museum of Zoology. Properly known as a baculum, the penis bone is common in mammals, including primates, but human males have to rely on blood pressure alone. The walrus is king dong. The known record belongs to an extinct species, and measured 1.4 metres. If you crave more information about penile scaffolding, head over to the Grant Museum, or read this fascinating article about humans lost their groinal truncheons.