The table decoration no self-respecting Scot should have
The Ceilidh Club put on a series of sell out events across several dates at Hammersmith Town Hall. These attract kilt wearers and stumbling whisky fools alike and the dance floor is always packed, much fun and pretty hazardous if there are any spillages. Arrive early is our advice. There's school dinner style Burns Supper on paper plates for all but the whisky wasn't up to much last time we went. However, it's a barnstorming Burns evening and just £14.50 a head.
If you want your quids to go to a good cause, there's a Charity Burns Night at nearby Fulham Town Hall. £25.
The booze hounds at Vinopolis are laying on a traditional Burns Supper on 25th with a hardcore whisky tasting for £49 a head. They're also hosting a ceilidh on 29th for a more reasonable £23 to include a dram on arrival, supper with the variant of a Burns Burger, a hot toddy and proper dancing action from 7.30pm with 'Licence to Ceilidh'.
The poshest of Scots pubs, Albannach on Trafalgar Square, has a £95 a head gourmet feast with music and dancing. At the other end of the scale, the Rob Roy pub - home of the official Aberdeen FC Supporters Club in London - will definitely be the place for drinking.
For those who quake at the thought of dancing with a sweaty, whisky fuelled partner there's a comedy showcase at the Leicester Square Theatre on 25th as a preview to the Glasgow International Comedy Festival. The bill includes some of our favourite comedians (Stewart Lee, Robin Ince, Tony Law, Andrew Lawrence) yet nobody Scottish as far as we can see. Wear tartan to get in the mood. £12.50.
Or you can DIY at home: Haggis, neeps and tatties is one of the easiest celebration meals to knock up with convenient vegetarian substitute available in authentic imitation sheep's stomach bag. Boil the haggis, swede and potatoes till they're beyond hope. Mash both sets of veg, and pile onto plate (more refined recipes are available). Get your formalities here and don't forget to toast to the Haggis, with a fine malt whisky and a ritual stabbing to make it "reekin' rich" is a must. DIY ceilidh courtesy of enthusiasts in Burundi. As the Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppets will tell you, if you don't give a toss and you don't give a fig, then you can definitely join in with the big jig: