Tits Out For The Paps

Priceless enough to be picked up in Private Eye's Pseud's Corner, Lady Gaga's inane ponderings on different shades of red were meant to exemplify her extraordinary intelligence, something that she mentions every time she's interviewed. While her academic genius is not yet manifest, she's certainly smart enough to get herself plastered all over the papers in a see through outfit, modestly covering her nips with masking tape and postmodernly brandishing a pap camera at the paps, all in the week her new "ride on your disco stick" video is considered too raunchy. So, the next release will be - wait for it - Paparazzi.