Cruel Kids Kill Cat Kilo

The police have their work cut out investigating knife crime and youth violence these days so we imagine they're not best pleased at having to track down the gang of 3 teens who eschewed blades in their pursuit of cheap and mindless 'entertainment' and instead indulged in some light felinicide, throwing poor puss Kilo, a former resident of Battersea and recently adopted by HMS Belfast as ship's cat, overboard into the drink. Police have branded the incident as truly despicable, which it clearly is, yet we're starting to wonder how you compare criminal despicability. As cat lovers, we feel for Kilo and her crew. Presumably she's sunk to the bottom of the Thames by now as no body was recovered but, unfortunately, far worse things happen at sea.