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Colonel, Colonel, There's A Caterpillar In My Chicken

Dean Nicholas
By Dean Nicholas Last edited 107 months ago
Colonel, Colonel, There's A Caterpillar In My Chicken
KFC Bucket

Colonel Harland David Sanders always vowed to take his ultra-secret family recipe of 11 herbs and spices for making his legendary chicken, fried in the Kentucky way, to his grave, a resting place he reached back in 1980.

The recipe remains a trade secret, one we suspect scores of scientists squirreled away in underground labs are still trying to crack. Perhaps it involves a touch of paprika, a sprinkling of pepper, a cumin seed or three? It's less likely the recipe calls for, say, a number of caterpillar-like beasties to be strewn liberally on top.

Yet that's exactly what a Dartford kid discovered in his KFC chicken wrap. Having devoured most of the meal, 11-year old George Parsons noticed a number of tiny creepy-crawlies bedding down in the lettuce. His mother was then shocked to see (entomophobes might want to skip this sentence), like something out of a David Cronenberg film, one of the creatures crawling up the side of her son's mouth. Uck.

The wrap was purchased at the chain's Dartford branch, and environmental health officers from the council are investigating, although no infestation has thus far been found. Those of a strong constitution can watch a video of the critters having a field day at the Colonel's expense. Kudos on the Parsons for managing to capture the evidence.

It's not the first time an unexpected surprise has turned up in a fast food box. In 2005 an American woman claimed that she found a severed finger in a bowl of chili at a Wendy's restaurant; however, the scam was rumbled when the diced-off digit was reunited with its rightful owner - a colleague of the woman's husband.

Meanwhile, the Colonel's chicken recipe remains safe, praise be, and will continue to enlarge the nation's waistband, come what may.

Image courtesy of SqueakyMarmot's Flickrstream via the Creative Commons Attribution license

Last Updated 05 June 2008

sonyactivision

As Harlan lay dying, his nurse propped a pillow poorly against his painfully swollen stomach and asked how he felt. He replied "Eat shit!" and then passed.

Kira

"But dad, how can you hate the Colonel?"

"Because he puts an addictive chemical in the chicken that makes you crave it FORTNIGHTLY!"