And on the eighth day, God created overdrafts. And we all rejoiced and said “It is good” and hit up the high street for some more brand name labels and useless knick knacks.
Banking: it’s not a glamorous business, really. They have been entrusted with people’s life savings, the fruit of their blood, sweat and tears, and what do they do? They make us jump through hoops like so many toy poodles in ballerina skirts and keep bending us over a barrel on overdraft fees and charges, as Tom Brennan has learned. So excuse us if we don’t boo hoo into our hankies when we hear they’re in trouble or have done something monumentally dim-witted.
In this instance though, we’re glad for the achingly slow and infuriatingly methodical banking system. HSBC have said they won’t let 35 year-old publicity seeker Sheridan Simove (who has a book coming out in August) alter the name on his account to ‘God’, insisting that they cannot accept a single name. That didn’t stop Mr Simove, from Wandwsorth. An HSBC spokesman said:
"He then came back to us and said he would be called Almighty God.
"However, regulations mean we need to be able to re-identify someone with a proof of address, using a utility bill, passport or driving licence for example.
"He is yet to provide us with this documentation, so his account is still in his original name for the time being.”
Note to Sheridan: changing your name to God or Almighty God will not get you laid more often or more drinks bought for you in the pub, though if you’re able to turn water into wine, we’re willing to do both.
Image courtesy of j l m's Flickrstream